FictionPress.com - Zen Phoenix's fanfiction

War Everlasting

2009-09-24T20:38:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy/Sci-Fi
Chapters: 18, Words: 92,457, Reviews: 122 Updated: 9-24-09, Published: 9-24-04
Status: Complete

Faeric Silvearre has been charged with the task of training a young Draconian warrior. Along the way he finds himself meeting many new people, including a street rat with a strange past...

Moments

2009-09-12T05:45:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 250, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

The Doctor had to show me how to properly lotion my wenus...

Road to Nowhere

2009-09-12T05:43:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 281, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

It might minutely be plausible to be one in a million. But more then likely you are like four or seven in a million...

Falling Up

2009-09-12T05:41:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 136, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: In-Progress

I've always wondered if fish have dreams...If I was a fish I know I would have one great all consuming dream. Not to be a fish.

Pressure

2009-09-12T05:40:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 104, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

I don't want to go to prison. I don't think I could handle the anal skullduggery...

Cantus Libertas

2009-09-12T05:38:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 56, Reviews: 3 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

Note to self: I hate you.

Mashed or Not

2009-09-12T05:36:45-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 145, Reviews: 3 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

If that's not the kettle calling the choir black...

The Moment

2009-09-12T05:34:08-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 147, Reviews: 3 Updated: 9-12-09, Published: 9-12-09
Status: Complete

If a tree falls in the forest do the other trees hold a service, cry, wail, and moan, then promptly forget the tree ever existed?

Figments

2009-04-28T15:18:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 209, Reviews: 6 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

My fear of being eaten has gone so far as to become an edible complex.

Winter Wonders

2009-04-28T15:17:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 82, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

There is nothing more American then baseball, apple pie, and a chinese elvis...

Calamitious Blues

2009-04-28T15:15:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 122, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

A man asked me who to blame for his house being torn apart by a tornado. I looked at him in all seriousness and said, "Blame the Butterfly."

Trickle Down

2009-04-28T15:14:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 152, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

I think it should be mandatory to abort all born again christians after they are born, but before they are born again.

Innocent

2009-04-28T15:11:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

For the latest in downloadable Zen click here @. Now temporarily available in Sober...

Dewdrop Valley

2009-04-28T15:10:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 258, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

Sometimes I take a deep breath and look at the world around me and think, "Damn it smells here..."

Winters Mourning

2009-04-28T15:08:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

Water is the only mother I will ever claim.

Turning Old

2009-04-28T15:05:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 81, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

Half the people alive today are riding the short train to stupid town...

To Feast on the Sun

2009-04-28T15:03:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 151, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-28-09, Published: 4-28-09
Status: Complete

I'm an inter-faith athiest, I deny the gods of all faiths equally...

The Sea of Doubt

2009-01-02T04:18:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 168, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

There should be a program for those addicted to religion. They could call it J.A. for Jesus Anonymous.

The Scarlet Solarium

2009-01-02T04:16:43-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 455, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

When I grow up I want to be a casual potentate.

The Fall of Shadows

2009-01-02T04:15:37-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 95, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

There are to many ugly people for there really to be a good god...unless he has my sense of humor.

Spectral Bliss

2009-01-02T04:14:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 257, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

Yes I hear voices in my head...but they are never talking to me.

Dragon Slayer

2009-01-02T04:13:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 321, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

If I built a little town out of popsicle sticks and marshmellows and invited dwarves to live there could I call myself Lord of the Wee?

Dead Until I Die

2009-01-02T04:12:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 90, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

Everyone gets all worked up when you mock what's his nuts and his cross.

Cryogenic Dream

2009-01-02T04:10:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 144, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

I'm that one dude and don't you forget it!

Miracle

2009-01-02T04:09:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-2-09, Published: 1-2-09
Status: Complete

I miss me already and I'm not even dead...

For Love of Her

2008-08-10T10:10:00-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 131, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

In the battle between the heart and the mind the only true winner in the end is the skeleton...

Crippled

2008-08-10T10:08:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 285, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

I've decided to stop putting things off till tomorrow...tomorrow.

Dance Today

2008-08-10T10:08:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 146, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

I never go to water parks in the Midwest anymore. Why do I need to see a family of 300 pound hambeasts forming cholesterol molecules using their bodies and yellow inner-tubes loosely connected by ionic fat hand holding?"

Till I am Shadow Too

2008-08-10T10:06:40-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

If anyone were to ask me to have sex I would have to answer with a nymphatic yes!

Passed Beyond

2008-08-10T10:04:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

I would have so many bands if I made a band everytime I heard a great name for a band. Like the Winking Sphincters.

Desolate

2008-08-10T10:03:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

I try not to wake up too happy in the morning. You never know where the day will lead and the last thing I want is to be guilty of premature joculation."

Woke Up Dead

2008-08-10T10:02:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 76, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-10-08, Published: 8-10-08
Status: Complete

I woke up dead half an hour before I went to bed...

The White Roof Conspiracy

2008-06-22T08:08:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 1,234, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

At some point this fiction must become reality or there will be no reality for us anymore. Is it already to late?

The Breaking Point

2008-06-22T08:04:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 451, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

A being pushed to far, will sometimes break in violent ways.

Bloody Sun

2008-06-22T07:47:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 34, Reviews: 7 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.

The Eyes of Eternity

2008-06-22T07:46:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 77, Reviews: 5 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

The problem with self discipline is it's so hard to force yourself to have it.

Chaz Nasty

2008-06-22T07:44:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 27, Reviews: 8 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

I tried to sit through the meeting for premature ejaculators, but I left early.

Paradox

2008-06-22T07:43:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 63, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

I hate that the sales clerk at the book store won't show me where the self-help section is. She said it would defeat the purpose

The Dance

2008-06-22T07:42:00-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 77, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

The suburbs are what is left when the developers rip out all the trees, then name the streets after them

The Majestic Roach

2008-06-22T07:40:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 62, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

The perfect formula for success: Rise early, work late, strike oil.

The Basil Truth

2008-06-22T07:39:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 71, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-22-08, Published: 6-22-08
Status: Complete

Existence: it's better than nothing

The Long Road Home

2008-04-30T11:10:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 7 Updated: 4-30-08, Published: 4-30-08
Status: Complete

I told her I was trying, but you can't milk a dead horse...

The Torture

2008-04-30T11:09:37-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 46, Reviews: 8 Updated: 4-30-08, Published: 4-30-08
Status: Complete

I find it very funny that "God" saves only those that know how to swim from drowning...

The Machine

2008-04-30T11:08:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 219, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-30-08, Published: 4-30-08
Status: Complete

Life just pinched me in the sphincter yet again...

The Agonist

2008-03-24T09:36:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 194, Reviews: 6 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

Wal-Mart, where white trash goes to die...or maybe that was shop?

Black Sheep

2008-03-24T09:35:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 83, Reviews: 6 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

The reason you don't have to take an aptitude test to have children is because our glorious leaders would never pass it...

The Sound of Self

2008-03-24T09:33:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 265, Reviews: 6 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

Don't mind me, my brains on a permanent walk-about...

Fickle

2008-03-24T09:32:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

God didn't make stupid people silly, that was just Satan peeing in the mixing bowl...apparently.

Drifting Shadows

2008-03-24T09:31:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 231, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

Your mom looks like she was slapped together with paste and safety scissors at summer camp. Then some kid took her home and gave her to his parents and they had to pretend to like her, but she just got thrown in a drawer next to the buckskin wallet.

All the Fading Flowers

2008-03-24T09:29:40-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 41, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

Jesus came to forgive us of our transgressions. In his infinite mercy he sacrificed himself to Lord Voldemort and the fearsome Nazgul. Ever since that fateful day, he has lain in cryogenic slumber within an adamantine cage, waiting for the glorious Raptur

Morose

2008-03-24T09:26:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-24-08, Published: 3-24-08
Status: Complete

Support evolution, Have your local idiot spayed or neutered.

The Glorious Death of Captain Quinn

2008-01-22T07:57:08-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Adventure/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 880, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: Complete

Sometimes the reasons for valor are more complicated then a storyteller would have you believe.

Wayward

2008-01-22T07:55:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 185, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: Complete

Faith is not a good enough shield against the recurve claws and forward facing eyes of life.

The Winters Queen

2008-01-22T07:54:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: Complete

My soul would make a great paper weight. Then it would have a purpose.

Wisps of Tomorrow

2008-01-22T07:53:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 31, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: In-Progress

I'm a realist, instead of cleaning I made my house out of dirt.

Homecoming

2008-01-22T07:50:50-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: Complete

Atheism the universal doctrine of NuUh.

Prison

2008-01-22T07:49:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 27, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-22-08, Published: 1-22-08
Status: Complete

The agony of my psychosis is softened by my narcissism...

I Stood Alone

2007-11-12T11:34:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 178, Reviews: 5 Updated: 11-12-07, Published: 11-12-07
Status: Complete

Bathing in someone's blood is not all it's cracked up to be.

Something's Wrong

2007-11-12T11:31:50-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 104, Reviews: 6 Updated: 11-12-07, Published: 11-12-07
Status: Complete

We're sorry, this brain has been disconnected, or is no longer in service.

Dreamlimit

2007-09-14T10:26:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General/Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 173, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-14-07, Published: 9-14-07
Status: Complete

Bobs restaurant really took off when he replaced the words 'tortured baby cow' with 'veal' on his menu...

Earth

2007-09-14T10:23:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General/Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 165, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-14-07, Published: 9-14-07
Status: Complete

I have decided that you plebians must now refer to me by the Unholy Tetragrammaton of my true name 'JSTN'.

The Day

2007-09-14T10:21:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 543, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-14-07, Published: 9-14-07
Status: Complete

A forlorn and depressed man finally finds a glimmer of hope...

Koi Arena

2007-09-05T05:07:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 202, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

I sacrificed my Tickle me Elmo to Hades...

The Mulberry King

2007-09-05T05:06:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 234, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

I hate gravity for having such a death grip on my privates...

Twizzler

2007-09-05T05:05:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

I always wanted to wander the western plain, unfortunatly I have a deathly fear of crashing...

Opiated

2007-09-05T05:04:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 333, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

Socalled 'metrosexuals' don't enrage me or threaten my sexuality, they only inspire a kind of deep pity. You don't fluff up your plumage to such a ridiculous degree unless you're incredibly desperate to ward off really big predators.

Soulfree

2007-09-05T05:01:29-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 62, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

When I eventually succumb to the withering effects of time and irony, I hope to have a hundred crying fans at my funeral pretending they knew me really well and using their grief to get laid.

Lost Zion

2007-09-05T05:00:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 124, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

Defication is such a filthy term, I prefer making an anal rendering.

Nevernow

2007-09-05T04:58:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 182, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

The reality is bees...

Faces and Shadows

2007-09-05T04:57:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 72, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-5-07, Published: 9-5-07
Status: Complete

I had the intent to be a nice person today. You should be happy with that, it is probably all your going to get.

Black Horizons

2007-07-03T19:11:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 331, Reviews: 5 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

I can lift a fully grown horse above my head, and I can hold my breath for ten minutes. To settle a wager,I once ate a pound of WalMart's strongest badger poison and then ran a mile in the nude. Lawmen fear me.

Intwined

2007-07-03T19:10:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 176, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Your Mom looks like a big flabby pile of bacon wrapped in flesh colored spandex.

Fiction With Diction

2007-07-03T19:09:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 172, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

I hereby confirm in writing that I buy children from their parents and use them to test my booby traps.

Soul Apart

2007-07-03T19:08:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 240, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

I am afraid that I will die without ever realizing my dream of trepanning a mermaid.

A Chance to Play

2007-07-03T19:07:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 323, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

And God said, Let there be eukaryotes to populate the Deep, and let them congregate and multiply in such a way as to form symbiotic relationships. And God called the symbiotic pairs multicellular organisms.The lost and controversial Book of Evolution

The Calling

2007-07-03T19:05:56-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 163, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

FIDELITY, n. A virtue peculiar to those who areabout to be betrayed.

Escape

2007-07-03T19:04:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 154, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Fat bikers shouldn't wear leather jackets. I'm pretty sure it's like Biblically forbidden to wrap a pig in cowskin.

After the End

2007-07-03T19:03:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 95, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

My fat sweaty neighbors are contemptible scum worthy of nothing more than a short life of physically demanding unskilled labor that culminates in a fatal accident and their bodies being ground up and sold as dog food in China to feed unloved poor people.

Doomed

2007-07-03T19:02:11-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 175, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Getting a bad review from an idiot is kind of like having your hygiene criticized by Pig Pen as he lays dying from Hepatitis C.

Luminous Equation

2007-07-03T19:00:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 125, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

I do not refrain from eating Jello because I do not like it. I don't eat it because I still believe in the existence of Teddy the Jello Troll.

Land of Sin

2007-07-03T18:59:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 449, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Don't take it the wrong way, when I say that I hate you, that mearly is an analogy for the vitriolic contempt I feel for your soul...

Fools in the Garden of ID

2007-07-03T18:58:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 25, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Nothing will ever make me want to bust a move...ever!

Shadow Chasers

2007-07-03T18:56:47-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 148, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

I wear my hair like a tempest of hatred that surrounds me every waking moment of my tormented existence.

Interrogation

2007-07-03T18:55:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 92, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

Sometimes chance just gotta screw ya.

Vitriolic Love

2007-07-03T18:53:45-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 202, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-3-07, Published: 7-3-07
Status: Complete

In all actuallity, when it comes right down to it, we are not...NOT, I reiterate. beautiful on the inside. We are more a squishy mass of goopy yellow, red, and pink, meat and pus.

Memoirs of a Tortured Soul

2007-05-11T19:45:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 850, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Dear Jesus Please make everyone die. Amen.

The Drunken Dance

2007-05-11T19:42:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 111, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Beat him with a fish and he'll never be hungry for fish again...

Turbulence

2007-05-11T19:41:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 241, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Who are you people and why am I naked?

The Sea of Me

2007-05-11T19:39:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 147, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

A fat man who loves himself is like god giving you lemons and you make lemonade, except it's really god throwing funnel cakes at you, and you eat them.

Tarnished

2007-05-11T19:37:29-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 7 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

I cherish those moments when it feels like god is peering directly at me, but deep down inside I know that all he is saying is, Nope, still retarded...

The Dancing Phoenix

2007-05-11T19:34:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 326, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

I created something for all you gamers out there that feel you need to lose a few pounds, it is called the 5 Bastard Spoon of Fasting.

Afraid

2007-05-11T19:32:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 162, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Life is like a box of chocolates, except they're all turds...

The Madness of Man

2007-05-11T19:31:39-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 127, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

I always wonder if when I am thinking, people around me can hear Flight of the Bumblebee playing.

The Kingdom Beyond

2007-05-11T19:29:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 568, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

I was crestfallen when I learned that you couldn't go to college to become a Samurai.

Lost Dreams

2007-05-11T19:28:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 391, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Sometimes I hate going to the store and buying both rat chow and cat food...Logic would dictate that I eliminate a step here.

Tides of Thought

2007-05-11T19:27:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-11-07, Published: 5-11-07
Status: Complete

Do you realize we are living in the largest insane asylum of all time. Ahh, but asylums have fences you say. We do, it's called the atmosphere...

The Greatness of Why

2007-04-02T07:49:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 117, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-2-07, Published: 4-2-07
Status: Complete

What the world needs now isn't love sweet love, what it needs is another good plague.

Museum of Self

2007-04-02T07:48:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 185, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-2-07, Published: 4-2-07
Status: Complete

You know that thing that has been bothering you for days...I did that.

Awakening Dragon

2007-03-13T08:17:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 165, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-13-07, Published: 3-13-07
Status: Complete

When the earth finally gets around to expelling this virus called man I hope I am the last one alive so I can yell, HA HA, SERVES YOU RIGHT, STUPID HUMANS!

Divine Integration

2007-03-13T08:16:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 107, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-13-07, Published: 3-13-07
Status: Complete

Life would be so much better without...well without you in it.

Fallen

2007-03-05T22:54:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 160, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-5-07, Published: 3-5-07
Status: Complete

Do the people in my dreams dream of me when they go to sleep?

Looming Epiphany

2007-03-05T22:53:50-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 63, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-5-07, Published: 3-5-07
Status: Complete

I've often thought that a mollusk could beat a mountain lion, if given enough time to strategize.

Casting Ophelia

2007-02-27T17:46:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 125, Reviews: 6 Updated: 2-27-07, Published: 2-27-07
Status: Complete

This society is what happens when you tell idiots there opinion matters...

Transcendalia

2007-02-27T17:44:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 4 Updated: 2-27-07, Published: 2-27-07
Status: Complete

The soldiers of the Burger King will never topple the McTatorship.

The Shadows of September

2006-12-28T11:48:29-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 311, Reviews: 8 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

Where do babies come from? Asked little Timmy. Martha froze. It would break his little heart if he knew about the experiment...

Goodbye Tomorrow

2006-12-28T11:44:15-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 120, Reviews: 7 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

Somebody remind me to bury the hookers before they start to smell...

Translucent Tears

2006-12-28T11:43:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 172, Reviews: 6 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

I tried to get a lesbian who hates men to love me by telling her my man meat is like a daddy longlegs spider, it may be poisonous but its mouth is so small it can't bite you....

Wasted

2006-12-28T11:41:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

Some people say it's not the size of the pencil that matters. But only people with small pencils think that.

Cluttered

2006-12-28T11:40:21-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 145, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

Humanity makes me want to hurt myself...well more humanity then myself...actually all humanity and zero me...man just screw you guys.

Wind Country

2006-12-28T11:38:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 85, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

All I got in my stocking for Christmas is a box of Pop Rocks and a can of coke...

The Beginings of Truth

2006-12-28T11:37:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 1,482, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

The world was not made for us, we were made from the world. And it's time we started acting like a part of it, not a consumer of it.

Genuinflection

2006-12-28T11:35:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 102, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

Guns don't kill people, bullets do you retard.

Hidden

2006-12-28T11:33:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 236, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-06, Published: 12-28-06
Status: Complete

I hate being so combustible, but usually only when I am on fire...

Wake the F&CK up

2006-10-23T08:30:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 217, Reviews: 7 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

My Homunculi staged a walk out... I feel so alone.

Time of War

2006-10-23T08:29:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 5 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

Congratulate me! I have finally made it to Santa's Total Bastard list.

Without You

2006-10-23T08:28:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 182, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

Yes I hear voices in my head, but don't worry, they only speak Tlingit.

Purple Toenails

2006-10-23T08:27:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 108, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

Nothing puts a bunch in my thong like people implying I'm not manly...

Who

2006-10-23T08:26:15-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 51, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

Jesus isn't so great, my level four mage can do all those miracles.

The Sunshine Girl

2006-10-23T08:25:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 35, Reviews: 4 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

I'm what lives in your closet.

Recipe 42

2006-10-23T08:24:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 58, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

If you squint and look at me sideways I almost appear human...almost.

Longing for You

2006-10-23T08:22:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 82, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

Get your head out of the toilet bowl... we don't taste waste.

Dead in the Water

2006-10-23T08:21:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 37, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-06, Published: 10-23-06
Status: Complete

My brain is a strange journey on a road made of peanut butter in a landscape of ramen noodles and cigarettes.

Demented Diligence

2006-09-21T14:21:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 169, Reviews: 6 Updated: 9-21-06, Published: 9-21-06
Status: Complete

I think back to the days when I breathed water and think...god I love gummy worms.

Born to Lose

2006-09-21T09:07:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 159, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-21-06, Published: 9-21-06
Status: Complete

Feeling overcrowded? Support the gay agenda...more ladies for me anyways ;).

The Whisper of the Wheel

2006-09-14T08:00:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 180, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-14-06, Published: 9-14-06
Status: Complete

If I were an amputee I would go to the beach and bury myself in sand. Then ask small children to help me get out and then when they start digging with their little plastic shovels I would lift my stump out of the sand and scream "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE"

Tilted Horizon

2006-09-14T07:57:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 74, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-14-06, Published: 9-14-06
Status: Complete

I try to listen to nature but all it says is, "Go, go, have your little thoughts."

Heckling the Sunrise

2006-09-02T20:34:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 381, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-2-06, Published: 9-2-06
Status: Complete

Must you rip me in twain and dance in my guts with such enthusiasm?

Simon Finch and the Specter of Oakham Woods

2006-08-31T08:44:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: General/Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 2,691, Reviews: 5 Updated: 8-31-06, Published: 8-31-06
Status: Complete

The heroic accountant Simon Finch misses his bus one dark night, forcing him to walk home through a gloomy wood full of shadows, moonlight, and...a ghost?

Seasons of the Soul

2006-08-31T08:42:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 129, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-31-06, Published: 8-31-06
Status: Complete

There are only two infinite things, really. The universe and human stupidity. And physicists are unsure about the former

Keep it in Your Pants

2006-08-31T08:39:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 364, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-31-06, Published: 8-31-06
Status: Complete

God created the dinosaurs to punish the gays. It's in Leviticus. "He who shall know another man so shall know the cruel talons of the raptor. Thus spake Jesus and then Jesus cast polymorph self and transformed into a bugbear. The sodomites scattered.

The Metal Night

2006-08-23T21:30:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-23-06, Published: 8-23-06
Status: Complete

You never realize how often ants burst spontaneously into flames until you really watch them with a magnifying glass on a hot summers day.

Tribal

2006-08-23T21:30:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 213, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-23-06, Published: 8-23-06
Status: Complete

I think about drowning my troubles a lot...but I can never get her to go swimming with me.

The Cleansing

2006-08-23T21:29:11-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 154, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-23-06, Published: 8-23-06
Status: Complete

When I was a boy, my mother wore a mood ring. When she was in a good mood it turned blue. In a bad mood, it left a big red mark on my forehead.

Sacred Rhythm

2006-08-23T21:27:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 163, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-23-06, Published: 8-23-06
Status: Complete

A funny thing I like to do at the chiropractors is, when he's working on me, I go limp and soil myself so he thinks I'm dead.

Dinner Conversation

2006-08-14T20:19:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 323, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-14-06, Published: 8-14-06
Status: Complete

"I have decided, in the interests of population balance, to fill the void left by the cave bears and start eating you all."

The Further Adventures of Simon Finch

2006-08-14T10:57:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Drama/Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 2,560, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-14-06, Published: 8-14-06
Status: Complete

"Simon Finch, everyone's favorite accountant, encounters an innocent in distress and must save the day yet again"

Sundered Heart

2006-08-14T10:03:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 342, Reviews: 5 Updated: 8-14-06, Published: 8-14-06
Status: Complete

That which does not kill you is only softening you up for later.

Summer Shadows

2006-08-11T17:41:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 117, Reviews: 6 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

The fact that I can't taste my own tongue is driving me mad...

Ren Diddle Diddle

2006-08-11T17:40:09-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 118, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

Did you know that you can turn in the skin of an unbaptized baby at Spencer's Gifts for store credit?

I Hate You

2006-08-11T17:39:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 487, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

If you want to get a feel for my utter boredom and disgust for humanity then just press the same key on a piano for 180 minutes while looking at a picture of a ball sack.

For The Gentle Troubador

2006-08-11T17:38:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 130, Reviews: 7 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

This Halloween I am going to wrap my man giblets in police tape and go as a crime scene.

Break Out

2006-08-11T17:36:36-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 145, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I wish it was legal to surf cars on the highway.

Dalliance with Darkness

2006-08-11T17:35:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 171, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I wish I had invisible hands so I could scratch myself in public...without people looking at me funny.

Only One Shoe

2006-08-11T17:34:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 91, Reviews: 5 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

Suicide hotline. Please hold.

For Eaten by Housecats

2006-08-11T17:33:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 117, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

It is my gathering and I will weep if I am thus inclined to do so.

What Funny Little Fish

2006-08-11T17:30:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 207, Reviews: 2 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I was wondering. How do you get your head so far up there? And how do you breath?

The Great Unknown

2006-08-11T17:29:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 168, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

Do you think I like pointing out the obviouse? Well, it is kind of fun laughing at you...

The Crystal Shade

2006-08-11T17:28:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 92, Reviews: 2 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I don't mind most hand-me-downs except for two. One is underwear, which I refuse to wear. And the other is the earth, which I have no choice about taking.

Meating Place

2006-08-11T17:26:29-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 74, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I'm God and so are my cat's...well, that one anyways.

Centrifuge

2006-08-11T17:24:39-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 2 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

I took a nap on top of the shelf today, just to see why the cats like it so much...

Cerridwen My Lover

2006-08-11T17:23:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 93, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

Sometimes you look at a guy and wonder whether his tan is real or spray-on. At least if he's Dracula we know for sure.

Dandelion Daydreams

2006-08-11T17:20:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 89, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-11-06, Published: 8-11-06
Status: Complete

Everyone keeps telling me that madness will take its toll. Good thing I have exact change.

Forever Today

2006-08-03T15:32:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 165, Reviews: 5 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

It's good to be the Zen...sometimes, Fricking Leeds!

The Rhyming Sublime

2006-08-03T15:31:36-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 105, Reviews: 6 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

I'm only human so screw off with your 'stay dark or the parents get it'. They already got it, I destroyed their will to live long ago and all that is left is to give them sweet release, so be my guest!

Life

2006-08-03T15:28:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 533, Reviews: 5 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

We're all pink on the inside, baby. Except me. I'm full of circuit boards and moths.

For Doozerballz

2006-08-03T15:26:58-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 174, Reviews: 3 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

Yesterday I ran over a rainbow and fashioned a festive cape from the corpse.

Nothing to Say

2006-08-03T15:24:47-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 65, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

I am not aging. I am simply leveling up.

The Reality of Faith

2006-08-03T15:23:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 596, Reviews: 4 Updated: 8-3-06, Published: 8-3-06
Status: Complete

I haven't lost it, I never had it to begin with...

Nothing More

2006-07-21T10:25:43-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 208, Reviews: 4 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

All hail 667, the neighbor of the beast!

The Spaces Between

2006-07-21T10:23:00-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 186, Reviews: 4 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

Dream

2006-07-21T10:21:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 22, Reviews: 4 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

My indian ancestors came when I called but all they did was rifle through my stuff...

Asylum

2006-07-21T10:20:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 61, Reviews: 5 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

This is the most delicious mortal sin since I violated my neighbor with a Charleston Chew.

Mental Thunder

2006-07-21T10:18:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 127, Reviews: 5 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

My entire image is carefully crafted to lure in the unwary.

Why Do I Care

2006-07-21T10:15:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 288, Reviews: 6 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

My date didn't believe me when I told her she was beautiful. No no, I said, lies are good for your complexion...

Counterfeit

2006-07-21T10:13:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 168, Reviews: 6 Updated: 7-21-06, Published: 7-21-06
Status: Complete

My danger stick is facing forward and has one eye. Does that mean I'm a sexual predator?

A Whisper of Wind

2006-07-12T09:08:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 128, Reviews: 6 Updated: 7-12-06, Published: 7-12-06
Status: Complete

Power doesn't come from faith or hard work or integrity. Power comes from being able to bite the skull off a bison.

Into the Unknown

2006-07-12T09:06:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 186, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-12-06, Published: 7-12-06
Status: Complete

I wander barefoot through the cosmic ether of thought and think to myself...didn't I have shoes on?

Fading

2006-07-12T09:04:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 155, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-12-06, Published: 7-12-06
Status: Complete

You won't laugh at my kickass sword collection when a violent peasant uprising threatens the social order!

Diluted

2006-07-12T09:03:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 170, Reviews: 3 Updated: 7-12-06, Published: 7-12-06
Status: Complete

I'm finished with these weak little gnomes! I'm getting a lawn golem!

Incomplete

2006-07-04T07:29:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 82, Reviews: 5 Updated: 7-4-06, Published: 7-4-06
Status: Complete

Life is a bucket of crap...but at least it's my bucket.

Graveyard Jitters

2006-07-04T07:28:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 6 Updated: 7-4-06, Published: 7-4-06
Status: Complete

Listening to you is like listening to a record backwards and I have only one response...huh?

A Memory in the Sand

2006-06-30T21:15:09-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 131, Reviews: 5 Updated: 6-30-06, Published: 6-30-06
Status: Complete

Don't waste time worrying for fools. No matter how many pounds of common sense you try to give them, they are still just dumb.

Need

2006-06-30T21:13:39-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 183, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-30-06, Published: 6-30-06
Status: Complete

You know what really keeps god out of your house? THE FACT THAT HE IS A FRICKING FIGMENT...

Summer 2006

2006-06-22T10:26:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 141, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-22-06, Published: 6-22-06
Status: Complete

People keep telling me to find Jesus. Not to worry, I tell them, I have his location pretty well nailed down...

The Boneyard

2006-06-20T12:42:47-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 73, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

I like to paint my name on things in blood...well not my blood.

All of Me for a Wandering Rose

2006-06-20T12:41:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 163, Reviews: 5 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

If you want a true feeling of liberation why not embrace apathy...then again I don't care what you do.

Today Was Supposed to be Tomorrow

2006-06-20T12:39:45-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 160, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

You do realize that we have long digestive tracts...which mean we are not true carnivores but herbivores. Ever wonder why most of you act like prey.

Song of the Astronomer

2006-06-20T12:37:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

I've invested so much time in trying to convince the female population that "Zen Phoenix" is the fifth food group...

Forget

2006-06-20T12:35:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 151, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

The neighbors were a little offended when they saw me pissing in the corner of my yard but, as I told them, "how else am I to keep God off my lawn"

The Big Joke

2006-06-20T12:28:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 160, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-20-06, Published: 6-20-06
Status: Complete

The end is horrible and squishy.

Testicular Fortitude

2006-06-05T09:18:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 256, Reviews: 6 Updated: 6-5-06, Published: 6-5-06
Status: Complete

Dressing up in victorian underwear and dancing in a graveyard does not a goth make.

The Last Ride

2006-06-05T09:16:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Action
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Drama/Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 2,201, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-5-06, Published: 6-5-06
Status: Complete

For Cerus vengeance is all the King has left him.

The Hunger

2006-06-05T09:15:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 83, Reviews: 2 Updated: 6-5-06, Published: 6-5-06
Status: Complete

Yes, infact, you can live your life hypocriticly... if that's all you aspire to.

Negative Space

2006-05-25T15:09:15-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 157, Reviews: 7 Updated: 5-25-06, Published: 5-25-06
Status: Complete

Last night as I lay on my back in bed looking up at the stars I wondered, where the hell is my ceiling?

Please

2006-05-25T10:48:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 157, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-25-06, Published: 5-25-06
Status: Complete

Do not eat the dingleberry smoothie! Dingleberries are not in fact berries at all. Now I know...

Solitude

2006-05-25T10:45:47-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 59, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-25-06, Published: 5-25-06
Status: Complete

Mein Schwartz est un flamen-fuhrmen.

Majesty

2006-05-17T13:11:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-17-06, Published: 5-17-06
Status: Complete

I wiggled and wobbled then I did fall down... a couple times. And I landed on my head, which bleed a lot. But I got ice cream so I'm alright.

We Just Are

2006-05-16T07:54:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 118, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

Who the hell are you people and where are my pants?

Hell

2006-05-16T07:53:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 80, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

Do not mistake my Misanthropic words for true hatred... it's just general dislike.

So Say the Children

2006-05-16T07:52:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Tragedy/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 485, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

A man faces the end of all he knows.

This Metal Man

2006-05-16T07:49:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 74, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

Someone told me to try Jesus and I told them that I would... but the edible parts had decayed long, long ago.

Somewhere Close to Nowhere

2006-05-16T07:47:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 110, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

I'm waving at you from the highest window of the Ivory Tower. Or through the bars on the window of the dungeon if I've somehow found my way into Solomon's.

Fire

2006-05-16T07:44:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-16-06, Published: 5-16-06
Status: Complete

You all just hate Americans because we have all the pie.

The Torment

2006-04-25T09:43:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 91, Reviews: 6 Updated: 4-25-06, Published: 4-25-06
Status: Complete

You must push yourself my child, for no one else knows where you keep the strawberries.

No More

2006-04-25T09:42:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-25-06, Published: 4-25-06
Status: Complete

I rolled a D-20 to see if I could get out of bed today but failed both my constitution and my strength. But apparently I look good not doing anything, so my charisma roll says.

Down in the Deep

2006-04-25T09:41:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 62, Reviews: 6 Updated: 4-25-06, Published: 4-25-06
Status: Complete

What? Did you say something? I'm sorry I was ignoring the fact that anyone else existed...

The Warlords Peace

2006-04-12T18:19:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 1,289, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-12-06, Published: 4-12-06
Status: Complete

Resigned to his fate a Warlord ponders his loneliness, that is until something unexpected happens.

Lonely Feet

2006-04-12T18:15:51-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 123, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-12-06, Published: 4-12-06
Status: Complete

All things in moderation my child, all things but sex, it's all about sex.

Design

2006-04-12T18:14:39-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 64, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-12-06, Published: 4-12-06
Status: Complete

Enjoy the desolation that is truth, or perhaps a gobstopper, which is desolate too.

Pride of the Forsaken

2006-03-25T13:32:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy/Adventure
Chapters: 3, Words: 15,152, Reviews: 15 Updated: 3-25-06, Published: 1-2-06
Status: Complete

Who is the stranger who appears at the gates of Durgans village and pays his way in heads? In his quest for the truth, Durgan will be drawn all the way to hell and back.

Torn Asunder

2006-03-08T13:27:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 75, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

I've always wondered how hotdogs can survive in the wild without eyes.

Piss Off

2006-03-08T13:26:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

Note to self: The big blue thing at the bottom of the urinal is not actually a gigantic blue raspberry Mento...

For Sisyphus

2006-03-08T13:24:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 135, Reviews: 2 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

I just found out the sea cucumber eats and defecates from the same orifice. At first I was disgusted, but then I thought "Now THAT's efficiency."

Faded Dreams

2006-03-08T13:21:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 30, Reviews: 2 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

My degus Count Fugly and One Eyed Tilla could kick Raunchy Pete's ass any day...

For Satan's Mittens

2006-03-08T13:19:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 2 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

I'm so lonely tonight. The cats popped my date...

At The End

2006-03-08T13:18:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 99, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-8-06, Published: 3-8-06
Status: Complete

I'm nothing more then a whimper in time...

Satyr

2006-01-24T19:34:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 137, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-24-06, Published: 1-24-06
Status: Complete

I've been smacked up beside the head with the epiphany two-by-four.

The Perfect Lonely Day

2006-01-24T19:33:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 121, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-24-06, Published: 1-24-06
Status: Complete

All the jive is mine!

Dreaming

2006-01-20T08:24:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 122, Reviews: 6 Updated: 1-20-06, Published: 1-20-06
Status: Complete

I'm so glad I'm finally losing weight! Could be the exercise and the good diet, or the evening walks with the neighbors. Or possibly the heroin.

Save the Suffering

2006-01-14T07:11:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-14-06, Published: 1-14-06
Status: Complete

No one at my high school reunion was impressed with me. All of them are doctors or lawyers or CEOs, but I KNOW I was the only Level 23 Dungeon Master!

Rage

2006-01-14T07:09:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 82, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-14-06, Published: 1-14-06
Status: Complete

Shut your mouth or I'll slap you with the wet end of my sock!

Cast In Stone

2006-01-02T08:18:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 95, Reviews: 10 Updated: 1-2-06, Published: 1-2-06
Status: Complete

I've started wearing a cross made of ham because my ex-girlfriend is a Muslim and I'm afraid she might infect me with her bite.

Hibernate

2005-12-29T07:44:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 128, Reviews: 6 Updated: 12-29-05, Published: 12-29-05
Status: Complete

The Troubadour never appreciated the statues that I would lovingly sculpt for her every day, and place gently on her pillow at night so they would be the first things she sees. She just yelled at me to stay out of the litter box.

The Lunchtime Adventure

2005-12-29T07:09:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 1,460, Reviews: 7 Updated: 12-29-05, Published: 12-29-05
Status: Complete

Simon Finch is not like other acountants. This is the tale of one of his greatest lunchtime forays into the hinterlands.

The Starchildren

2005-12-29T07:07:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 264, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-29-05, Published: 12-29-05
Status: Complete

Cross me and I'll have the Troubadour kick you with the pointy shoes. Then set my pack of rabid reviewers on you.

The Fear

2005-12-29T07:06:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 121, Reviews: 8 Updated: 12-29-05, Published: 12-29-05
Status: Complete

I only lie when neccesity dictates that I do so... but I do so well.

Summer Of The Soul

2005-12-14T17:32:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 93, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-14-05, Published: 12-14-05
Status: Complete

I know my cats hate me, they keep peeing in my shoes.

Shall I Die Today

2005-12-14T17:26:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 133, Reviews: 6 Updated: 12-14-05, Published: 12-14-05
Status: Complete

I am the merkin raider.

Thoughts

2005-10-09T14:16:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Essay
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 2, Words: 1,182, Reviews: 9 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

Well I thought you might like to see what it's like in here, so whenever I have a thought I feel like writting down, other then a story or poem, I will make another entry, enjoy...

Fever Dream

2005-10-09T14:13:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 5 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

I am the gray area...

Eyes In The Darkness

2005-10-09T14:11:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 115, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

I'm glad I can't fly, it hurts enough falling from this height.

Winter Comes

2005-10-09T14:09:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 48, Reviews: 5 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

These mud pies taste like crap!

The Hidden River

2005-10-09T14:07:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

I wear the fabric of time...

Nihilistic Tendency

2005-10-09T14:05:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 5 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

God, if god there is, is a solipsist.

Sweet Whisper

2005-10-09T14:03:15-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 26, Reviews: 6 Updated: 10-9-05, Published: 10-9-05
Status: Complete

I have drank the drink of the drunken drunkard.

The Caves Of Forever

2005-09-13T16:30:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 58, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

There is nothing funnier then watching a dumbass be himself.

Visions Of Nothing

2005-09-13T16:30:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 53, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

Sorry, I failed 'How To Be Normal' in High School...

Who Are You?

2005-09-13T16:28:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 117, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

It hurt's right here. Not so much here or here, but just right here.

Despair

2005-09-13T16:27:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 3 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

I surf the tides of despair.

Peace Comes In Moments

2005-09-13T16:26:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

My pee glows in the dark, but only when I drink glow sticks...

Ending

2005-09-13T16:25:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-13-05, Published: 9-13-05
Status: Complete

Just for the record, I don't care.

To Kill A Man

2005-09-01T19:01:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 634, Reviews: 7 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

A young man discovers for the first time what it is truly like to kill a man.

Into The Darkness

2005-09-01T19:00:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 51, Reviews: 6 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

Life is like the popsicles the strange man on the corner used to give me as a child; It tastes really good in the begining, but by the end you realize it's just a penis dipped in Tang...

War Machine

2005-09-01T18:59:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 96, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

I've decided to become an active participant in natural selection.

The Humdrum

2005-09-01T18:58:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 57, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

I can understand that life knocks you down sometimes, but does it have to stomp on your nuts while your there...

The Music Of The Damned

2005-09-01T18:56:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 6 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

Blame the gnome.

Please Notice Me

2005-09-01T18:55:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 31, Reviews: 5 Updated: 9-1-05, Published: 9-1-05
Status: Complete

Another word for 'fleet', is 'coward'.

The Earth Will Remember

2005-06-20T17:42:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 73, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-20-05, Published: 6-20-05
Status: Complete

For Hung Like A Squid, you rock man.And remember that all roads should be traveled.

The Whispering Winds Of Edelford

2005-06-09T09:43:09-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 102, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-9-05, Published: 6-9-05
Status: Complete

WooHoo natural 20, wait where am I?

A Midnight Rose

2005-06-09T09:41:58-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 4 Updated: 6-9-05, Published: 6-9-05
Status: Complete

When I die I would like the words, "Hotel Maggot" carved into my skull.

Today I Will Whisper

2005-06-09T09:40:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 68, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-9-05, Published: 6-9-05
Status: Complete

Just so you know, "The 8-ball told me to", does not stand up in court...

Thinking Of Death

2005-06-09T09:39:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 55, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-9-05, Published: 6-9-05
Status: Complete

Nothing says I hate you like a brick to the head.

On Dark Rainy Nights

2005-06-09T09:38:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 31, Reviews: 3 Updated: 6-9-05, Published: 6-9-05
Status: Complete

I'm mentally eclectic.

Forgotten

2005-05-19T19:00:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 47, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-19-05, Published: 5-19-05
Status: Complete

I hate when people don't stand for the national anthem. So when I was at the basketball game and the guy next to me didn't stand up, I grabbed the unpatriotic bastard and threw him down the stairs. Then after that, I took his wheelchair and threw that too

Feel The Sorrow

2005-05-19T18:59:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 36, Reviews: 5 Updated: 5-19-05, Published: 5-19-05
Status: Complete

Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear eats you, or violently sodomizes you.

Degu Dreams

2005-05-19T18:57:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-19-05, Published: 5-19-05
Status: Complete

The Lord works in mysterious ways in order to screw you out of what you deserve.

Empty Days

2005-05-19T18:55:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 23, Reviews: 4 Updated: 5-19-05, Published: 5-19-05
Status: Complete

Fool me once, shame on you,Fool me twice, shame on me,Fool me three times, shame on your mother, who is a whore

Where Has He Been

2005-05-19T18:54:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 52, Reviews: 3 Updated: 5-19-05, Published: 5-19-05
Status: Complete

If I was your God I wouldn't show my face either.

Blame It On The Bong

2005-04-18T08:01:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 77, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-18-05, Published: 4-18-05
Status: Complete

Corruptions are clogging all the holes in my head.

The Shadowed Dawn

2005-04-18T07:37:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 23, Reviews: 7 Updated: 4-18-05, Published: 4-18-05
Status: Complete

I want to make a human sized bug zapper, so I can fling random people into it when i get bored...

For Tickle Me Preacher

2005-04-16T07:07:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 37, Reviews: 2 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

Puns are just nasty, besides being the root of all things unsound.

Enough Said

2005-04-16T07:05:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 36, Reviews: 6 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

I like the unfortunate, they make me feel good about myself...

For Hung Like A Squid

2005-04-16T07:03:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 61, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

Acid makes the world go round, round...and round again.

Cold

2005-04-16T05:53:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 33, Reviews: 5 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

You just missed me...

Last Man Standing

2005-04-16T05:28:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 140, Reviews: 2 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

I'd like to thank nature, and society, for making me the cold, unfeeling, bastard I am today.

Masterful Con

2005-04-16T05:26:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 47, Reviews: 3 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

I wish I could take a year of life from everyone and add it to mine... I don't want to live forever, just longer then I’m gonna!

ADD

2005-04-16T05:22:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 65, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! OK, I'm better now.

The Walking Dead

2005-04-16T05:21:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 75, Reviews: 2 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

Don't eat the cookies! They are tainted with EVIL!

Art

2005-04-16T05:18:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 51, Reviews: 4 Updated: 4-16-05, Published: 4-16-05
Status: Complete

I wish I could dip my brain in chocolate...among other things.

The Storm

2005-04-02T09:10:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 48, Reviews: 7 Updated: 4-2-05, Published: 4-2-05
Status: Complete

Save me all the squishy bits.

Sinner

2005-04-01T02:07:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 22, Reviews: 2 Updated: 4-1-05, Published: 4-1-05
Status: Complete

If I eat meat, and am made of meat. Does that mean that plant's are made of sunshine?

Dark Day

2005-04-01T02:03:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 91, Reviews: 2 Updated: 4-1-05, Published: 4-1-05
Status: Complete

I'm so poor I don't even get a damn hand basket, I'm going to hell in brown paper sack!

Mirage

2005-03-21T18:34:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 68, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-21-05, Published: 3-21-05
Status: Complete

I eat sand!

Crimson Tears

2005-03-20T08:53:21-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 7 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

Long live the forgotten.

The Sunny Day Rule

2005-03-20T08:52:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 63, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

.I require the meat of a thousand babies, stir fried with almonds and butter, served in a thousand very small bowls... and perhaps a mint sauce

Peace With The Dawn

2005-03-20T08:50:50-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 40, Reviews: 6 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

I am ambidextrously parasitic.

The Rascal

2005-03-20T08:49:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 69, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

Theres always truth in fiction, but truth is sometimes wrong.

Solitary Man

2005-03-20T08:48:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 2 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

We can't all be right, can we?

Hegemony

2005-03-20T08:46:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 147, Reviews: 3 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

Nothing is unnatural to the universe.

A Bit Of Space

2005-03-20T08:45:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 2 Updated: 3-20-05, Published: 3-20-05
Status: Complete

No Timmy, Gods don't grow on trees.

Oblivious Too

2005-03-09T15:59:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 52, Reviews: 6 Updated: 3-9-05, Published: 3-9-05
Status: Complete

Shhh, its really two candles I'm holding together, not one candle burning at both ends.

Weirdo

2005-03-09T15:58:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 94, Reviews: 7 Updated: 3-9-05, Published: 3-9-05
Status: Complete

Keep talking, I'm sharpening my sword.

Unfinished Dreamer

2005-03-09T15:57:23-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 81, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-9-05, Published: 3-9-05
Status: Complete

It's hard enough without thou bitching in mine ear.

Fractured Security

2005-03-09T15:56:21-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 4 Updated: 3-9-05, Published: 3-9-05
Status: Complete

It sucks to be a tall man in a short house.

Signs Of The Sun

2005-03-02T18:40:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 126, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-2-05, Published: 3-2-05
Status: Complete

If Jesus could really do what they say he could, then he would be a "Mutant", and not the "Son of God", as previously assumed.

Just Burn

2005-03-02T18:38:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 59, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-2-05, Published: 3-2-05
Status: Complete

I asked to be taken seriously, but nobody was listening.

The Shameless

2005-03-02T18:37:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 161, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-2-05, Published: 3-2-05
Status: Complete

I tripped and fell off the beaten path into the quagmire of disillusionment.

Happy Grass Stained Feet

2005-03-02T18:36:51-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 94, Reviews: 5 Updated: 3-2-05, Published: 3-2-05
Status: Complete

Nature must have been thinking of me when it created breasts...I wish I had a pair

Silent Companion

2005-02-19T06:04:08-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 163, Reviews: 3 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

Why am I so sweet? I was fed sunshine and sugar till the age of fifteen.

Tell No One Why

2005-02-19T06:03:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 34, Reviews: 4 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

I would eat my left nut if Drew Barrymoore asked me to.

Da Vinci Is Dust

2005-02-19T06:02:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 50, Reviews: 3 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

If all the beings of the planet got together in a big group and ran in the same direction, I wonder if the earth would spin faster. That or stop...

For Wrath Of Cthulu

2005-02-19T06:00:58-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 55, Reviews: 2 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

It's like when your writing your name in the snow and you pee on your shoe's and you think, ' I should go inside before my toes freeze, but come on man, who really likes peaches anyways?

Fairies Revenge

2005-02-19T05:59:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 174, Reviews: 2 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

How much must you offend yourself before you can't even masterbate?

Ashen Goals

2005-02-19T05:58:51-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 71, Reviews: 2 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

I wish we used marshmallows for pillows, then it would be ok when I ate it...

For Solidarity

2005-02-19T05:57:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 57, Reviews: 2 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

Skinny people have no souls...

Sing

2005-02-19T05:54:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 3 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

Your entitled to your opinion, but please have it silently in the corner from now.

Passionate Moments

2005-02-19T05:53:39-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 34, Reviews: 1 Updated: 2-19-05, Published: 2-19-05
Status: Complete

Wake me up before the end.

Pound By Pound

2005-02-09T18:20:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 52, Reviews: 6 Updated: 2-9-05, Published: 2-9-05
Status: Complete

I hate the sound of a fat man crying...you fat, fat, crying man!

Silent Multiverse

2005-02-09T18:18:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 43, Reviews: 5 Updated: 2-9-05, Published: 2-9-05
Status: Complete

'The fairies did it' is no longer a viable excuse.

Concrete Icons

2005-02-09T18:16:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 40, Reviews: 3 Updated: 2-9-05, Published: 2-9-05
Status: Complete

My mind is always twelve steps ahead of my feet.

A Pound of Pebbles

2005-02-05T11:24:21-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 50, Reviews: 4 Updated: 2-5-05, Published: 2-5-05
Status: Complete

Do you want to touch my pebbles?

So Long Mary

2005-02-05T11:21:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 107, Reviews: 8 Updated: 2-5-05, Published: 2-5-05
Status: Complete

Americans gibber on in their odd little quasi-language like they know what they are saying...silly Americans.

Valankar Can

2005-02-05T11:18:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 175, Reviews: 7 Updated: 2-5-05, Published: 2-5-05
Status: Complete

I fell through a crack in the Earth and wound up on the dark side of the moon, it's cold here and there's no microwave...

Grandpa and Georg

2005-02-05T11:10:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 136, Reviews: 5 Updated: 2-5-05, Published: 2-5-05
Status: Complete

I wish the world changed colors like a gobstopper as we sucked away at it.

This Torpid Dream

2005-02-05T11:06:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 78, Reviews: 5 Updated: 2-5-05, Published: 2-5-05
Status: Complete

I play hide and seek with shadows.

Bedtime Prayer

2005-01-27T12:29:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 29, Reviews: 9 Updated: 1-27-05, Published: 1-27-05
Status: Complete

I hate peas, and anyone who likes them, and anything even remotely hinting at the flavor of a pea. Damn all you pea lovers to the nine hells.

I Too

2005-01-24T07:41:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 153, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

JellyBellies are uncannily similar to their individual namesakes.

Peabody Smalls

2005-01-24T07:38:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

If my characters came to life they would beat my ass for going to such imaginitive extremes.

Ode To Me

2005-01-24T07:36:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 29, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

Yes , I actually talk this way...

Should I

2005-01-24T07:32:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

Your all in trouble when my stinger grows back...

Gather Round

2005-01-24T07:31:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 20, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

If I stood on a cliff, in front of the moon, playing an electric guitar as my hair blew in the wind. Then I would be cool!

Believe Me

2005-01-24T07:30:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

I sail the seas in a ship made of Popsicle sticks and glue.

Little Joys

2005-01-24T07:29:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 16, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

My demon is laughing RUN!

This Little Ball Of Life

2005-01-24T07:28:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 190, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

Fall to your knees and debase yourself before the mighty...or not.

The Key

2005-01-24T07:26:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 37, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-24-05, Published: 1-24-05
Status: Complete

I am a spork Shaman.

Burning

2005-01-15T14:28:11-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 97, Reviews: 8 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

I cringe before a different kind of god.

I Am

2005-01-15T14:27:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 127, Reviews: 6 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

I was led astray by the television, but found my way back via the radio...

If

2005-01-15T14:25:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 15, Reviews: 6 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

If god was a strawberry I would eat him, cause man that would be one fine strawberry.

Why

2005-01-15T14:25:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 143, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

I tried to summon the spirit of Nostradamus to answer all my questions, but only got the spirit of Pooh. I learned little about life but much about honey.

Scars

2005-01-15T14:23:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 44, Reviews: 7 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

I'm afraid I took a turn for the worse and died in my sleep tomorrow.

For Diddlyshit

2005-01-15T14:22:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 36, Reviews: 1 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

Don't ask, it's a safe bet that I don't know what I'm thinking.

Buttermilk Sunshine

2005-01-15T14:21:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 15, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-15-05, Published: 1-15-05
Status: Complete

Gobstoppers are the fruit of a candy god. mmmmm Gobstoppers.

Strawberry Daydreams

2005-01-08T10:24:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 45, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I like to bath in strawberry jello.

For Two By Two

2005-01-08T10:23:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 33, Reviews: 2 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I hope I reincarnate as a tiger, cause man tigers are cool.

I Will Be Free

2005-01-08T10:20:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 181, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I ate a worm once, but not on purpose.

A Whisper In The Wind

2005-01-08T10:19:56-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 57, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I wonder what I would smell like if boiled in oil?

Not Today

2005-01-08T10:18:55-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 88, Reviews: 6 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I think the heads of all religions should fight it out in a cage match to the death, then we would know once and for all who's god was stronger. Oh and also cause it would be just about the funniest thing I ever saw. lol...old men fighting, hehe.

Calluses

2005-01-08T10:17:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 125, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

The Easter bunny and I are not on speaking terms anymore. Not since the rubber ball incident.

Faults

2005-01-08T10:14:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 51, Reviews: 5 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

Note to self, fat people are not always jolly...

Gathering Darkness

2005-01-08T10:13:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 148, Reviews: 2 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I followed the light in the darkness, but it was only a giant angler fish that ate me.

Secrets

2005-01-08T10:12:36-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 85, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I mailed myself an anonymous Christmas card, just to keep me guessing.

For Elves Stole My Baby

2005-01-08T10:11:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 1 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I absorbed my inner child while trying to fast.

Lost

2005-01-08T10:09:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 105, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

How many people with ADD does it take to change a...look, a flower!

Mad Landscape

2005-01-08T10:08:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 93, Reviews: 1 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

My body keeps telling me I'm dead...but I just ignore it.

Blind

2005-01-08T10:07:37-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 32, Reviews: 2 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

Santa drinks the blood of sinners.

Truth Is Not Paid For

2005-01-08T10:06:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 2 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

My skeleton keeps trying to escape it's meat prison.

For Jimmy The Hamster

2005-01-08T10:04:20-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 43, Reviews: 4 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

The cats ate the mailman...I warned him to knock!

Good and Evil

2005-01-08T10:02:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 22, Reviews: 3 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

I made a mockery of time. It's retribution is slow but painful.

Fire It Up

2005-01-08T10:01:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 47, Reviews: 2 Updated: 1-8-05, Published: 1-8-05
Status: Complete

Bums taste like old shoes.

Ashes in the Void

2004-12-31T09:53:11-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 99, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-31-04, Published: 12-31-04
Status: Complete

I’ve been trying to stop eating unicorn meat for years…but I just can’t.

Yin and Yang

2004-12-31T09:51:43-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-31-04, Published: 12-31-04
Status: Complete

Creationism is the root of all evil!

Dreams of Rain

2004-12-31T09:41:36-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-31-04, Published: 12-31-04
Status: Complete

A man on T.V. said that if you hit a midget on the head you get 40 gold coins...It's not true, It's not true at all. :(

To Swim With The Fishes

2004-12-28T18:00:14-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 65, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-28-04, Published: 12-28-04
Status: Complete

My garden gnome keeps killing my neighbors...

Sword Dance

2004-12-28T17:49:22-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 75, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-28-04, Published: 12-28-04
Status: Complete

I dance in puddles...

For Three If By Air

2004-12-28T17:37:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 56, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-28-04, Published: 12-28-04
Status: Complete

I use weighted dice... :)

The Seeker

2004-12-28T17:35:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 135, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-28-04, Published: 12-28-04
Status: Complete

One hundred posts yeah for me!

Personality and Bone

2004-12-20T12:26:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 20, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-20-04, Published: 12-20-04
Status: Complete

Did you see which way I went?

The Shoe Rebellion

2004-12-20T12:23:36-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 160, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-20-04, Published: 12-20-04
Status: Complete

Beauty is whatever makes you smile!

Remember Me

2004-12-20T12:21:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 86, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-20-04, Published: 12-20-04
Status: Complete

You found me in a black void, and left me in a whirlwind of transient nothingness.

Little Brothers

2004-12-20T12:17:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Tragedy
Chapters: 1, Words: 103, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-20-04, Published: 12-20-04
Status: Complete

Will you still love me when the sky glows red with my rage?

Jacob's Rage

2004-12-15T11:50:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 68, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

How similar we are to monkey's, some of us more then other's...

Sword Song

2004-12-15T11:47:33-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 74, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

98% Water, 0.5% Meat and Drugs, 1.5% Sugar, = ME.

For Ratbastard

2004-12-15T11:42:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 52, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

Assassins came and knifed my pillow again, thank god I sleep in the closet... opps.

For Foolhardy

2004-12-15T11:40:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 64, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

Dragons will sing of my death, then toast my corpse with mushrooms.

Cerulean

2004-12-15T11:37:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

I painted God once but lost the picture.

Space Men Cometh

2004-12-15T11:35:56-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 131, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-15-04, Published: 12-15-04
Status: Complete

I burnt my social security card in hopes that I would cease to exist.

How Unlike the Whippoorwill

2004-12-13T18:25:49-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 66, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-13-04, Published: 12-13-04
Status: Complete

I'm lost on the road to nowhere...

The Wanderer

2004-12-13T18:23:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy
Chapters: 1, Words: 1,946, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-13-04, Published: 12-13-04
Status: Complete

A village learns that people are not always what they appear to be.

One Cold Morning

2004-12-13T18:21:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-13-04, Published: 12-13-04
Status: Complete

Strawberries make me smile. :)

Envy the Ignorant

2004-12-13T18:14:40-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 73, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-13-04, Published: 12-13-04
Status: Complete

Floating away on bubbles of joy and nitrous.

Cracks in my Cortex

2004-12-13T18:08:29-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 24, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-13-04, Published: 12-13-04
Status: Complete

I bleed syrup...

Dejected

2004-12-12T17:57:41-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 54, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-12-04, Published: 12-12-04
Status: Complete

Time is a river I like to pee in...

Broken Morning

2004-12-12T17:08:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 54, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-12-04, Published: 12-12-04
Status: Complete

Long live the Anonymous!

Silence

2004-12-11T11:07:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 151, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-11-04, Published: 12-11-04
Status: Complete

I wish I had plush ears so I could hear what the stuffed animals were saying.

Notes From the Colony

2004-12-10T12:47:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 45, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I ate a pixie once. I only got sparkly poo though, not at all the outcome I had hoped for.

Atheists Christmas

2004-12-10T12:45:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 77, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

Jesus ate my liver, then replaced it with holy light. Unfortunately this does not process waste well...

Terza Rima

2004-12-10T12:44:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 116, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I die in my dreams...

For Scoobydoodoo

2004-12-10T12:43:13-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 101, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I stepped in poo this morning and almost wrote about it. But I decided instead that the incident was dead to me and had never actually happened. Do you smell something?

Mountains of Mystery

2004-12-10T12:42:15-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 61, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I ate my stash this morning...

Spirit Hawk

2004-12-10T12:41:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 62, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

Hello? Where the hell am I...

My Sweet Drool Machine

2004-12-10T12:40:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 65, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I am so many people I have forgotten all their names.

Dark Path

2004-12-10T12:38:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I pee sunshine!

Bad Choice

2004-12-10T12:37:37-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 151, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

The whiskey and bandages did little for my shredded soul.

For Cantebury Jane

2004-12-10T12:36:37-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 85, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

My soul is eroding like the rocks on which I trod.

Wicked Winds

2004-12-10T12:35:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 68, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

I am a slave to the masses.

Hidden in Fantasy

2004-12-10T12:34:08-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 124, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-10-04, Published: 12-10-04
Status: Complete

Time is my enemy.

Visions of Past

2004-12-05T11:07:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 154, Reviews: 6 Updated: 12-5-04, Published: 12-5-04
Status: Complete

Why won't you let me put spaces in my villanelles, bastard program...

Inevitable

2004-12-05T10:59:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 69, Reviews: 7 Updated: 12-5-04, Published: 12-5-04
Status: Complete

Death doesn't bother me, its living that puts a bunch in my shorts.

Inverted Vertigo

2004-12-04T07:18:54-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 7 Updated: 12-4-04, Published: 12-4-04
Status: Complete

My head hurts when I imagine infinity.

One More Day

2004-12-03T15:10:09-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 822, Reviews: 5 Updated: 12-3-04, Published: 12-3-04
Status: Complete

A condemned General contemplates the circumstances that brought him to his present state.

Breathe

2004-12-03T11:08:21-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Spiritual
Chapters: 1, Words: 126, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-3-04, Published: 12-3-04
Status: Complete

I was God once but quit when I grew tired of your endless plight.

Tomato

2004-12-03T11:06:30-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 4 Updated: 12-3-04, Published: 12-3-04
Status: Complete

Pasley pirates pilfer pointedly while painfully pontificating.

Eyes

2004-12-03T11:05:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 13, Reviews: 2 Updated: 12-3-04, Published: 12-3-04
Status: Complete

Dizzy dragons dive daringly down during the daytime.

Confiscated Sausage

2004-12-03T11:04:17-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 176, Reviews: 3 Updated: 12-3-04, Published: 12-3-04
Status: Complete

Man, I crack my shit up!

The Last Bastion

2004-11-27T14:25:59-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fable
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Fantasy/Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 4,611, Reviews: 10 Updated: 11-27-04, Published: 11-27-04
Status: Complete

All that stands between the last fortress of humanity and its destruction at the hands of demonic forces is a brave king and his men.

Screaming Towards Oblivion

2004-11-24T06:35:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 121, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-24-04, Published: 11-24-04
Status: Complete

Human meat tastes like pork... :)

The Cabin Boy's Lament

2004-11-23T17:58:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 247, Reviews: 5 Updated: 11-23-04, Published: 11-23-04
Status: Complete

They should invent a candy that screams when you bite it. and bleeds nougat.

Solipsist's Funeral

2004-11-22T17:59:16-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 112, Reviews: 6 Updated: 11-22-04, Published: 11-22-04
Status: Complete

How many Solipsist's does it take to change a light bulb...whom shall I say is asking?

Trapped in Unreal

2004-11-21T07:31:18-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 162, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-21-04, Published: 11-21-04
Status: Complete

I am a loadstone for weirdos.

Song of the Godless

2004-11-20T17:45:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 79, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-20-04, Published: 11-20-04
Status: Complete

I'd be tyrant if I wasn't so lazy...

Diamante Palindrome

2004-11-20T16:42:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 16, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-20-04, Published: 11-20-04
Status: Complete

Ya get it huh, huh... :)

Chaos of Dreams

2004-11-14T08:15:06-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 120, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-14-04, Published: 11-14-04
Status: Complete

God ate my homework...

Villanelle Style

2004-11-14T06:57:52-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 147, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-14-04, Published: 11-14-04
Status: Complete

The demons pantsed me in the grocery line...again,

Contaminated Harvest

2004-11-10T05:37:08-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 29, Reviews: 5 Updated: 11-10-04, Published: 11-10-04
Status: Complete

My apple is bleeding...

Killing the Paperboy

2004-11-06T11:29:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 127, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

For Davin.Long live the fighters. I often fight with myself, but its always a draw...

Darkest of Days

2004-11-06T10:46:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 53, Reviews: 5 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

50 yeah for me...I once put 50 pieces of gum in my mouth on a dare, it was hard to chew. I also found it hard to chew when I was dead.

Diamante Style X2

2004-11-06T09:48:00-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 34, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

I really like sweets, especially the kind with peanut butter, I like the way it feels when I eat it, I'm not snobbish I eat both smooth and chunky. Did you know peanuts grow underground? I always thought they grew on trees...

English Sonnet

2004-11-06T09:10:24-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

If you know of other styles you think I might like Lady Jane, just let me know, and anyone else for that matter.

Spenserian Sonnet

2004-11-06T09:06:19-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 109, Reviews: 6 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

God ate my shoe...

Cinquain Style

2004-11-06T09:02:40-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 40, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

These will probably get left justified, like the Palindrome and Diamante styles did. So just imagine it centered lol.

Acrostic Style

2004-11-06T08:59:50-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 37, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-6-04, Published: 11-6-04
Status: Complete

Ok I added rhyming but I was bored...Deal :)

Pantoum Style

2004-11-05T10:25:57-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

I ate my shirt today...

Palindrome

2004-11-05T10:24:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 21, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

blah blah blah

Monorhyme Style

2004-11-05T10:22:28-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 65, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

And another

Diamante Style

2004-11-05T10:21:42-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 22, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

Yet another style

Clerihew Style

2004-11-05T10:20:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 19, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

Limerick

2004-11-05T10:18:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 28, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

lol

Epitaphs

2004-11-05T10:17:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/General
Chapters: 1, Words: 46, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

Playing with diffrent styles today.

Wandered Away

2004-11-05T10:15:47-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 92, Reviews: 1 Updated: 11-5-04, Published: 11-5-04
Status: Complete

Could happen.

To Be King

2004-11-04T05:59:25-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 308, Reviews: 2 Updated: 11-4-04, Published: 11-4-04
Status: Complete

This fell out my head this morning enjoy!

Captive of Fear

2004-11-02T08:22:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 119, Reviews: 1 Updated: 11-2-04, Published: 11-2-04
Status: Complete

A little truth.

Nothing

2004-11-01T18:56:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 36, Reviews: 4 Updated: 11-1-04, Published: 11-1-04
Status: Complete

...

Killing my Dealer

2004-11-01T18:32:07-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: M
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 312, Reviews: 3 Updated: 11-1-04, Published: 11-1-04
Status: Complete

Just so you know, motsugori is poisonous blow fish.

The Gray Man

2004-11-01T18:27:12-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 109, Reviews: 1 Updated: 11-1-04, Published: 11-1-04
Status: Complete

Thoughts about balance

Visions of You

2004-11-01T18:26:04-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Love
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 86, Reviews: 1 Updated: 11-1-04, Published: 11-1-04
Status: Complete

One for my ladie.

Finding Balance

2004-10-31T19:21:00-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 172, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-31-04, Published: 10-31-04
Status: Complete

A trip into my world.

Epiphany

2004-10-31T11:00:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Spiritual
Chapters: 1, Words: 126, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-31-04, Published: 10-31-04
Status: Complete

Have I seen the light?

For Fortress of Steve

2004-10-31T10:59:01-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 42, Reviews: 1 Updated: 10-31-04, Published: 10-31-04
Status: Complete

Toilet Material

Berserk

2004-10-30T05:51:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Fantasy
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Fantasy
Chapters: 1, Words: 150, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-30-04, Published: 10-30-04
Status: Complete

For my favorite Anime.

For Sisterdarkness

2004-10-30T05:49:35-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 69, Reviews: 1 Updated: 10-30-04, Published: 10-30-04
Status: Complete

Yeah I love me too.

The Smell of Reality

2004-10-30T05:47:51-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 67, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-30-04, Published: 10-30-04
Status: Complete

How's it smell?

For Jolly Roger

2004-10-30T05:45:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 122, Reviews: 1 Updated: 10-30-04, Published: 10-30-04
Status: Complete

Arr.

For my Fans

2004-10-27T18:22:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Family
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 98, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-27-04, Published: 10-27-04
Status: Complete

God I love you guys.

Penn and Teller

2004-10-27T18:21:27-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 111, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-27-04, Published: 10-27-04
Status: Complete

I wish I could have been in Dresden.

Slamming the Theist

2004-10-27T18:19:46-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Spiritual
Chapters: 1, Words: 206, Reviews: 4 Updated: 10-27-04, Published: 10-27-04
Status: Complete

In loving Memory of Jesus 0-33 AD

Dragon's Repast

2004-10-26T19:24:32-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Fantasy
Chapters: 1, Words: 240, Reviews: 5 Updated: 10-26-04, Published: 10-26-04
Status: Complete

Would you find it worth it.

Fairy Dilemma

2004-10-26T18:25:02-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 273, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-26-04, Published: 10-26-04
Status: Complete

First aliens now fairies...

Vulcan's Lament

2004-10-25T16:10:56-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 169, Reviews: 8 Updated: 10-25-04, Published: 10-25-04
Status: Complete

Nature is a harsh mistress.

Aliens

2004-10-24T07:19:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 261, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-24-04, Published: 10-24-04
Status: Complete

Aliens broke my bong.

Drifting

2004-10-23T17:34:40-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry
Chapters: 1, Words: 114, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-04, Published: 10-23-04
Status: Complete

guess

Soldier's Death

2004-10-23T11:28:45-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: War
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Adventure
Chapters: 1, Words: 123, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-23-04, Published: 10-23-04
Status: Complete

No freebies read it.

Darkest of Friends

2004-10-15T10:44:10-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 138, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-15-04, Published: 10-15-04
Status: Complete

Watching

Drowning

2004-10-15T10:40:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 91, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-15-04, Published: 10-15-04
Status: Complete

Drowning

Am I Awake

2004-10-15T10:37:31-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 92, Reviews: 2 Updated: 10-15-04, Published: 10-15-04
Status: Complete

The lonliness of existence examined.

Body of Sin

2004-10-01T18:58:34-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: General
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Horror
Chapters: 1, Words: 60, Reviews: 3 Updated: 10-1-04, Published: 10-1-04
Status: Complete

My dark thought for the day. Enjoy.

Fredrick the Great

2004-09-29T17:36:38-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Poetry/Humor
Chapters: 1, Words: 109, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-29-04, Published: 9-29-04
Status: Complete

A little insight.

Feral

2004-09-28T17:53:53-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: War
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 115, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-28-04, Published: 9-28-04
Status: Complete

Beware my wrath.

Existence is Futile

2004-09-26T13:33:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Poetry/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 100, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-26-04, Published: 9-26-04
Status: Complete

You know!

For Fiddlesticks

2004-09-24T18:59:44-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Haiku
Language: English, Fiction Rated: T
Genres: Humor/Angst
Chapters: 1, Words: 19, Reviews: 1 Updated: 9-24-04, Published: 9-24-04
Status: Complete

For my favorite reviewer. You rock, man.

Mind Killer

2004-09-22T14:58:03-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K+
Genres: Drama/Angst
Chapters: 1, Words: 135, Reviews: 3 Updated: 9-22-04, Published: 9-22-04
Status: Complete

Some think my mind is already dead.

I Who Am I

2004-09-17T15:07:48-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Humor
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: General
Chapters: 1, Words: 35, Reviews: 4 Updated: 9-17-04, Published: 9-17-04
Status: Complete

Written in 8th grade or so. Just an experiment in amusing myself! :)

Descent

2004-09-17T14:55:05-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Life
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 43, Reviews: 2 Updated: 9-17-04, Published: 9-17-04
Status: Complete

Are the experiences of living worth the death waiting for you at the end? You be the judge.

Lost Moments

2004-09-15T17:30:26-08:00

Author: Zen Phoenix
Category: Sci-Fi
Language: English, Fiction Rated: K
Genres: Sci-Fi/Drama
Chapters: 1, Words: 324, Reviews: 7 Updated: 9-15-04, Published: 9-15-04
Status: Complete

A man contemplates the meaning of death while floating alone in space.