Nice piece.. I liked the rhyming it was good.. I expected a slightly longer piece but this is short and to the point.. Its neatly done..

That was very nice. I'd like to thank you for your review on "Slash and Burn." Actually, it was OOC because it was sorta like another way to describe my feelings. I know it was kinda messed up, but I didn't proofread it. Anyways, nice job and don't stop writing.

Hehe, I like, it's a very . . . scathing poem, feels like your talking right at the reader *is intimidated now, shields head*

And yeah, rhyming kills me too, thats why I don't do much poetry. Some sugs:

"When you said 'forever'
I thought you meant 'forever.'"

could be:

"When you said 'forever'
I thought you meant for ever."

A 'lil thing, but I thought it added a little more variety, as well as a little more meaning :)

Funny you thought of this during music class, in my opinion it sounds more like a song than a poem, stick a tune on there and well, who knows :)

Awww- sadly sweet.
Hidden, repressed sadness 'I promised you I wouldn't cry'.
Crushed hopes 'I just wanted us to be together'
And gets more bitter and angry in the 3rd stanza.
Last stanza showing the despair and confusion- with all plans dropped, there's nowhere to go, so there's also a sense of being lost.
Very scathing and upset last lines.

loved your poem... i can relate to it all that well... sigh... there is no 'forever' right?

Nice poem!!! I can sort of understand this situation you tell here, and I can understand how you feel. A very moving poem, keep it up.

By the way, thanks for putting me on your fav. list!

Stupid girl... rn't we all? very good poem. altho i think u struggle a lil' to hard to ryhme forever in that one verse...what does endeavor me? i'm really not sure. but other wise good good stuff. did ya see? i'm posting that story i wrote frosh year... and i also posted another poem called "you'll regret" take a look when u get a second. i think it's pretty good..but anyways i'm rambling now so i'll go.bubbiez
strega/kate

:'( Nice job though. Keep it up

-Jessie

Awesome poem. Some good quotes too.
"It's a game you play with girls like me." , "Yeah. I'm a stupid girl, it's true. I must be, cause I fell in love with you." A definite ouch right there. The poem has a lot of truth and feeling, good job. You really captured the idea of it all.