That infernal bitch. Killing a cat. She oughta BURN for that!
Damn good chapter, rock on!

Yep, I pegged Titi for that kinda gal. Those "Look at me I'm powerful and gorgeous" ones, are the ones you want to watch out for. My mother was like that.
This is great stuff, rock on!

historically, Smenkhare married Meritaten, so, was older than her by Kiya. But that's OK. DNA tests done recently insist that Nefertiti is Tut's mother, and I honestly don't know whether to believe what I've been told since 1976, or not. Ah well, still good enough stuff for me. I can see the jewels and pleated linen in my mind's eye, and smell the exotic fragrances in my imagination. That's the boy that brought me to the dance, and with him I shall dance :P
Rock on

Ah, she's preggers, yay!
rock on

I always got that kind of vibe from Nefertiti, as well. Kind of haughty, to say the least. Kind of snotty as well.
rock on

oh god, the mother-in-law! Horrors! My husband and I have no mothers-in-law or (sadly) fathers-in-law. And we like it that way (sorta - our dads were really wonderful guys). Good story, wonderfully written
rock on

They really thought she'd never rise above their dreams for her, now they're dealing with their jealousy over what she HAS become. There will be ugly talk in her absence, I'm sure. Women are like that. Small minded people have small dreams, anything above those small dreams is inconceivable. Poor things. No more pity for them. She made her fortune truly by herself, clearly with no help from them, why waste another heartbeat's thought for them...
Rock on

Great. One flaw, though, I think that the word "fake" is out-of-place here. Perhaps "falsify"?
Rock on

wow. It reads like the diary of a confused young girl whose head is turned at the change in her life and circumstances. Clearly this was your intent. You succeeded.
Rock on

Good stuff, lots to mull over. Sex scenes are difficult to write. Getting the right words to describe the event. Rock on

Love it. Favoriting it. That remark about the pale eyes is similar to what my Cherokee ancestors thought about the first whites they ever saw, lol. I laughed when I read it.

I've been an Egyptology freak since 1976. Very nice story so far. Plausible and well-written
Rock on

This makes me want to cry
I expected she'd die
But just when he was checking how she was
And I was hoping he'd be more caring, you know? Especially when she died, I mean he just gave her thanks and huhuhu can I just cry myself to sleep
I know that wasn't exactly the most coherent comment, but I feel so bad for her (and for him) and after all the days of the two of them loving one another they had an argument and she just had to diiiiiieeee (crycrycry)
But nonetheless, this is such a beautiful story. I am so sorry it's only now that I'm reading this (after 10 years of this being on the site) because I am, at this moment, quite fascinated with Egyptian history ( romance teehee) like Sphinx's Princess and Sphinx's Queen.
Thank you for posting this (I think I'll go cry now)

thanks!

This was an AMAZING STORY! please continue to write, I'm not sure if you still check your reviwes considering you finished this story 7 years ago, but if you still need ANY help, with ANY of your stories, I would love to help you edit them. Please continue to write as this story was amazing!