FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Creation Theory 2003-01-14 ch 1,   | First have to say that the poem wasn't exactly to my liking. No mistake i liked the flow and content and such, but you may want to put in a bit more structure into the spine of this thing. It has the makings of a great poem, or perhaps even a song... since that's what i enjoy doing with poems. But it just needs tweaked a little bit. As for the ** part, i suggest using it in something else. great basis for another poem, short story or whatever, but it just doesn't quite fit the poem here. sorry if i've offended, but i think that something like "HEY GOOD JOB" doesn't help at all. |