so this will be my last review tonight... will you think less of me for liking this? no? good then.
see you in 7 hours
the lover

"Her mother used to tan her pretty periwinkle hide if she were idle."

Read that sentence out loud. It's lovely, slant rhyme, and two different non-primary or secondary colors.

The best part of the story by far was your inventive use of color. After reading a few of your pieces, I'm finding that to be a theme.

"He looked like a tree's nose when very drunk."
What a great line.

I think you should print out this story and the fruit loop one that you wrote (I forget what it's called), go through and highlight every sentence that involves a color. Look at your phrasing and build a story off your descriptions.

You're on my Author Alert, so I'll be waiting...

Strangely, the things written after midnight usually end up the best...in a very weird way. This was funny...I liked it much.

I enjoyed this story. It was very creative and humourous, not to mention it sort of brings out a person's inner child. lol, McGuyver...now, that's rich ^__^

I loved it!
It sounded a little lame at first, but I read it and I loved it! It would make a wonderful childrens book. You should get it published.

Gah! LOL! That was absolutely hilarious! Call me a crazy three-headed goat with the rickets, but I thought the hospital faeries were great! *looks around* Wait, so *that* why my jell-o was taken. And the assylum! The truth has come out!

That is hilarious! I love it!!

Some missing words or misplaced words but, you know, nothing major. ;)