hola!
the thing that really struck me about this poem was how true everything you say is. like, as you grow older, the joys of childhood become dead and the soul becomes jaded. well, that's how i interpreted it anyway. : D
i also enjoy the way you make "you" open to interpretation. i believe you were correct in doing this because most likely, each individual has their own "you," depending on their life experiences and personality.

excellent job, and thanks for the very kind review! i hope you're having fun on holiday.

-ab

Yes, that was definitely bitter. And the second line was very powerful, bringing the poem to life.
Good work, I liked it.

It's very, very good, but I think it needs more definition. I can't quite put my thumb on it, but something is missing. I think it is that you need to define more clearly what "you" is. Is it joy? Kindness? Life? Maybe even all three?

Even so, I loved the poem. Keep writing!

-shadowdancer

I like it. Great imagery. :)

This is a beautiful poem, and the ending's so sad! I like the way you've structured it as well.
Very good, you're a talented writer!

I love this. Its true. I have a first love who I always think on. the only thing is I hope I can always keep in touch with him. *it hurts to love someone that way sometimes. It really does. And thats weird for me to say since I'm only 16 but u could be five and know things some 20 year olds don't.

Ah.what a sad ending! Not heart-wrenchingly so, but it's very poignant.made me feel a pang in my heart when i read the last line. That is your intended effect, no? =)

aw so sweet good one