Hmm... maybe you could call it "expectations" or "expected visiters"? You wrote a wonderful description of the lady...now she only needs a name to fit the face. -Kez

Interesting story so far. I'm really enjoying it. There's no need to apologize for short chapters... they happen. No one said they had to be long, anyway. Keep writing!

Wow. Intriguing chapter. I want to see what happens...a lot. Especially with Zaden and Red.

I have just fallen in love with your fic. Methinks that If I were Dane, Mike and Paul would have been permenantly maimed long ago *evil laugh*. Anyway, no crticism for you. -Kez

I want that boy's room. -kez

Ahh...I love it! Hehe. Nicely described and the last sentence makes me want to read more!

no real comments 'cept o-O-o :) keep it up. you'd better, cause all the authors of the stories i've been reading have put 'em on hold, all 'cept you! (well, yours and The Heretic, but that is so damn long and i think that if i'm gonna read that i need to finish my curent real book first) DO YOU CARE? NO! SORRY BOUT THAT! getting carried away w/my rambling again :) anyhoo write more :D

*LIZ*

really beautifully written. your writing is SO discriptive. it really makes the whole thing that much better. i have a problem in that i always forget to FULLY describe things in my stories (or at least in the good ones) b/c i get wrapped up in the plot and dialogue etc. it's sometimes hard to really set the scene in such a solid way, but you do it. keep writing and i'll keep reading! :D

*LIZ*

hey again...

once again, very good, but too short. you always seem to leave me wanting more and that MUST be a good thing! :) thanx, i didn't realize you'd reviewed so many of my poems. i appreciate it! keep writing, and, btw, i love that thing at the end of this chapter... pretty.

*LIZ*

Woah. *blinkblinks* I'm very impressed with your writing, but must admit the editing threw me a little...!

It's fascinating, though, and I hope you continue.

Wow, very good.

Thanks for your review, and yes , I did have another version, but I decided to re-post.

o! a killer? o hm. well... update! *LIZ*

o more good stuff!

i'm so curious about all of this!

*LIZ*

i like it, but i'm a bit confused, who is who? Williem is that outcast? and Dane has black hair? i thought he had blonde? Its a bit confusing jsut fix that up and it will be fine.

o someone else! i guess you have more of an idea as to where yo're going now? well either way, i think this is promising, if it'd just start!
i'm just kiddin!
ya have some fragments that could be fixed by instead putting them on the end of sentences by using a comma. fi: "It was but a dream. Nothing more." hows bout- "It was but a dream, nothing more." there are a few of em but it's not that important anyway. :)

*LIZ*