I loved it, i got this from jack can you please write more? i want to know what happens next!

epp! cassia when do we get the next chapter?

I just read through chapter 2 - Knock Knock - again, and i can tell you honestly that i can't find much fault! In fact you write in a way that catches the reader like a wave and once you're on you can't stop! There is just one little thing i would have liked and that is exclamations during the shooting. Even though not all of the speach is loud, i'm sure that at this point it is urgent and would look more so if it we're exclamated. You have also done a wonderfull job with your descriptions. Eg. "Plaster exploded off the walls in little craters." It is so indirect and still so perfectly explanitory that the reader would find no reason to hesitate and think about it.

And again, please please please add the next chapter!

luv,
madhatter

LMAO, this is great stuff; VladmirsAngel was right. But when should we expect more? When you take another week off sick? That's too cruel ...

BRILLIANT introduction ... starts a little Discworldsy, ie perfect.

To start with, I loved the title, as well as the city's name. It paints images in my head before I start reading.

I like that.

So far I loved it. Your characters are very real, your writing is great and your style keeps my interest.

I'll be back for more.

*applauds* Nicely done! Good build-up of suspense...and I loved the action sequence: “Tom? You don’t have to use the radio..we’re only here…” *snickers*

^_^

I so totally love this. Keep updating Please. this is going into my favorite stories list.

Great beginning, I just wish I understood the backround a bit better. Please update!!

I see the writer's block wore off with a vengance then wolf!! ^_^

Very nicely put together first chapter! I look forward to seeing what happens next.