Their leader was a mean man named Radian.
That sounds kinda... flat.
Their leader was the despicable crook Radian.
Tweak it a bit that's a example.
Otherwise GREAT STORY

I really like your story except the end came kind of quickly. You could of put some more about the battle or something.

WAI! That was cute! I like this! ^__^ Kids will love it too. Those mean, mean... um... Kinisian guys! Grr! Storming the castle like that! Are you gonna do more? You should do more! ^_^