This is amazing! I love dark and depressing stories, in my opinion, every real life story is. I'm going to be showing this to the few friends that I have and see if they like it. I'm sure they will, it's so great! Keep up the awesome work!

Definitely dark, but well written.

One comment, though: Formatting a story as one huge paragraph makes it hard to read. Perhaps you might consider changing that.

Apart from that, a nice story.

yes indeed a depressing story. Well written, although it could be a little less casual. Somehow stops the flow of reading. Also, the plot seems to lack a bit of reality...otherwise, GJ GJ. Never stop writing!