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| garyjackson 2003-04-14 ch 1, | abuseOne thing about this poem, is the feeling that comes across. |
| billiem 2003-04-14 ch 1, | abuseGreat poem, even though it's depressing. The world we live in often seems real messed up, but you just have to remember to love yourself the way that you are and don't take ** from no one. Because you are who you are and nobody has the right to tell you how to act! Be proud of yourself and walk along the street as if you owned the world! Just a few mistakes you might want to correct: "enemys" should be spelled "enemies" "nothings" you missed an apostrophe "noting's" "word" I'm supposing you wanted to write "world" "witch" means as in a witch who performs spells, what you were meaning to write was probably "which" "brake" is spelled "break" otherwise you mean, as in stopping something "to" is spelled "too" in this case... "to" is when you're perhaps heading towards something... eg. I'm going to the store". On the other hand when you write "too" you use it... eg. "Am I too weak" "dum" spelled, "dumb" "some one" is one word "someone" Sorry... I know I seem like a correcting freak but I mean, reviews are here so that people can improve their poems right? Otherwise you just hear people saying "Good poem" which gets kinda boring in the long run. |