 markmark261 2005-04-05 . chapter 1Interesting first chapter although I couldn't help but draw parallels with the usual suspects (Buffy, Zatanna, Harry Potter). I'm not sure if the blue thing worked (it kept reminding me of Alan Moore's Swamp Thing story My Blue Heaven, and also when the song turned up I wondered if it was a Blues song and also wondered if the black magic should have been blue magic). If there had been a second chapter I'd have definitely carried on reading.
On the typo front I couldn't work out what "the young woman of yet walked closer to it" should have read but presumably "walked up to steps" should have been "walked up the steps". |