Hmm, this Max character. Gives me a bad feeling. I like Niall and Owen.

Megan

Interesting chapter, Owen seems like a cool guy, though he has shady friends. Again, a few minor redundancies but all in all it moved the story along.

*continues ominous music*

What did this divine intervention? or Who?

Is she safe? Is Marly safe or is she in dangerous trouble?

Anyways...

Till the next next time,
Alex
'A simple student in the bureaucratic nation of bureaucrats of the United States of America run by bureaucrats in an everchanging bureacratic world.'

I like it. It's intersting and you left me at a cliff hanger! Bad bad woman! jk.

Anyways good story and keep it coming.

I reveiwed so.. that means you love me! hehe I feel loved.

Hmm seems interesting. This Owen charcter seems cool. I wonder where you will take it... Onto the next chapter!

YAY! Thank you so much. He really loves his sister, doesn't he? That's so sweet. Aww. Love the ominous music. Update soon!

Megan

Hello, I liked this story a lot. It's interesting, though I say that to everyone. I love it so far, especially Owen, hahaha, we haven't even met him that much, hahahaha. Update soon!

Megan the moonlitdemon

*sasha stands teetertottering at the edge of the story, crying out to Maharanjoni* "Please! It's cruelty to leave me hanging like this! WRITE MORE"

Its got a good, original idea behind it. But it could flow better. Keep working on it, and give the girls names.

Good job and work on it.

Uh huh... and... ...and... and! ! ... ... ... !*warrior cry*! *pouts* ..and... ?