This is a very good short story, something many people can relate to. I liked your description of the person's smile lighting up the room, and giving life to those around, etc. That created a clear image in my mind of what the narrator was seeing. It it a bit depressing, though, innit? The narrator seems a bit off-balance, but hey, if it love, who wouldn't be?

This is really good. Are you gonna continue?
*lime-girl*
PS 'I Capture The Castle' IS a real book and it's also a real movie!

I love this one!

So sweet. So sad. I've been there many times before.

BAD WORD! you wrote a BAD WORD! well just letting you know. tootles

I can definetly relate, please update

good. i like it, please continue!

You are very good at expressing emotion. I could relate to your writing too. Great job!

hm. interesting. i'll tell you wha i told the last person i read- youre mixing two kinds of writing: wierd and detahed, the detailed kind. your echunks about 'hello, etc..." is all random, thats good. youre good at that. but then you bring in other stuff, like all discrpitive abotut he eyes, it just doesnt seem right in your poem/thing. sorry if thats confusing. :))
-lucy