I liked the idea, and it has potential to be good, but as it is the emotions are way too unbelievable. Andy and Nick switch roles and personalities too often in such a short amount of time. It's understandable that at your lover/brother's funeral you will have lots of conflicting emotions, but the way Andy and Nick jump around like

That was really, really, beautiful, and sad. I Love it.

hey, i know i've never reviewed before on fp, but when i read this, i just had to. it really gets to you and has that literal tilt to it that gives it elegance and nuance. The themes also run deep and true, somewhat like the recent Brokeback Mountain, in the way it fits perfectly in its imperfection. like a broken arm that fits at your side. well i think you're a good writer, basically. You just need to expand on the idea, and you'd have a work of perception of humanity. maybe you could add in more similar anecdotes and string them together with the theme of a diary [be creative!], or show the contrast of life before and after this incident, or how this incident affected the views of others around. just the little details in human life that make up the macro picture. you rock ;)

This is going straight onto my favourites list... raw and beautifully written. The last few lines are so moving!

Well, I love plays, but I haven't read very many beyond Shakespeare and the random famous one here and there, so...forgive me if I make any wierd comments.

I really enjoyed this. If the play section on fp is half as good, I think I should go check it out. Just through the dialogue you really captured the feelings of a funeral, both from romantic love and brotherly love. You also worked in God, which is always a question in death. I loved how you said that God wouldn't condemn love. good job

You should really act this out.

Jesus, you made me cry. If that's the first real script you've done, then you're a bloody genius. This was brilliant. Beautiful, touching, moving... God, I sound like a bad movie review. But this was amazing. Really. Thanks for writing it. I need more tissues.

This is good. It feels very much like the end of a movie, although it would also make a fascinating beginning.

Great job! This is amazing!

... whoa...

Ya know, we could make a movie together, and it would be so amazing! Muahahahaha!

Wow... I cried. That was... beautiful. Very, very beautiful, tragic, yet so goddamn realistic and... I am speechless.

beuatiful, beautiful, beautiful! wonderfully written, wnderfully thought out. i can picture it being acted...oh wow it's just awesome. wow. you are amazing...

ohh...

WOW!

That...made me cry. Beautiful. Good job. I don't see a lot of play-formatted stories that I like, but I enjoyed this one.

wow. that was one of the few stories/plays that I have ever read and gotten teary eyed from. Wow, I repeat. The ending was so sudden...but it was like...perfect. Strong writing, I'd love to see this performed. Dude, you have talent. You know if the world would read this...it would really change things. I mean, there is so much prejudice aganist homosexual people...this really...can change people's views about homosexuality. It was strong, and the flood of emotions was...wow. That really is all I am able to say...wow wow wow. The whole story like revealed itself. I didn't have to read twice, cause as I was reading I like went back and forth from the beginning to the end. When I didn't understand something I would go back and place things together. Strong work...great work...wow work. lol. Hey, you go to college in Baltimore? I live in baltimore. lol. funny. I'm just going into high school, but my sis is in college. What college? it's okay if you don't wanna tell me, I understand. But I am curious.

This truely deserves to be performed on a well-known stage somewhere. Wow...