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| angela 2008-04-04 ch 13, anon. | abusethis is the third time i have read this. I can say the story is toyally revamped. Takeshi now reminds of tamaki from ouran. Especially that piano playing. |
| lil'gurL aka Qiianer 2008-03-22 ch 16, | abuseYou've finally updated=) Its a great chapter as always. Man, so many people had been commenting that the older version was great too! This is your second time revising this right? Is there a way I can read the very first version? =) |
| japanera 2008-03-21 ch 16, anon. | abuse,.o i c,.uve been revising the story,.well wat can i say,.ive finished reading ur original plot a long time ago,..and i think dis revising stuff is actually great,.i like how the chapter connect with each other,.dis r d things dat i noticed,.d things u add in d story,.akemi's not abducted in their house anymore,.michie revealed some riddles o makoto,..akemi eating behavios/smoking and drinking,.the catholic school,..akemi seeing the journal and the picture of takeshi's family,..the piece playing,.lsatly akemi being abducted by a madman,..hmm,..i do hope u will not change some of my favorite chapters,..well wat can i say just kipup the good work,..i hope ur story san turn into a manga or anime,..something like that,..bcoz this is one of a hell story,..gambatte,.. |
| Regin 2008-03-20 ch 40, | abuseI Like, I Lust, I Love!! |
| Ami 2008-03-10 ch 1, anon. | abuseOh my god! Who knows, this may be the most amazing story on the planet, but I couldn't get through the first half of the first chapter, not because the writing's bad or because I don't like the plot, but because you used the phrase BROWN-HAIRED LASS so much! I counted. In the first two chapters alone there are: Seven counts of "Brown-haired lass" Two counts of "Auburn-haired lass" One count of "ebony-haired lass" Four counts of "lass" by itself. And, twelve times that you identified the heroine as "brown-haired" Seriously. We get the point. She had brown hair. Like I said, the writing wasn't bad but I just couldn't get into the story because every other paragraph I was like, "OMG! Lass again?". Just be careful not to overuse phrases like that in the future, and change it up sometimes. It's okay to call her "girl" or "Akemi". Otherwise it makes your writing seem repetitive and amateurish, which is a shame because you're a good writer. |
| Lady Allaria not on account 2008-03-07 ch 2, anon. | abuseJust wanted to point out that in Japan kids go to school monday though saturday. You mussed that part up just a tad, thought I'd let you know. |
| Destiny 2008-01-22 ch 13, anon. | abuseI read the first version of your work and I completely love it. Now, reading the revisions, I can't help but to think that I may enjoy this one more. I've never been so curious as to what is going to happen. I'm excited, your totally gifted! Sincerely, Destiny |
| tancsadesgal 2008-01-13 ch 40, | abuseSweet! I really love this story. You are a very talented author. Some part of it was not really right like the fact that Akemi's friends were more angry about her whereabouts instead of worried and so on but then again Iguess that makes this story all the better. To appreciate the good things in life you have to live through hell I guess. I'm not making much sense am I? Anyway, I love this story, the plot, the characters especially Takeshi. He's such a kickass. Honestly, kidnapping a person just because they turned you down? That part really hooked me to this story. |
| claireponcherrii 2008-01-04 ch 1, | abuseI like this. cool. |
| lil'gurL aka Qiianer 2007-12-28 ch 1, | abuseHello there! I finished reading this about a month ago and I'm kinda apolegetic to only leave a comment now. Generally, I think its really a great story with great context and oh, how I loved the ending=) By the way, are you re-writing/editing this at the times being? I was re-reading this again and I realised the changes. Do write more! Hehe... |
| fallen cherry 2007-09-30 ch 1, anon. | abusewho the hell has rudy red eyes? please, if you wish to write realistic fiction, please make it real. i've never met a japanese person with blonde hair, or even red eyes. kthanxbai :) |
| atreyu love 2007-08-03 ch 18, | abuseMan i love this story :D |
| atreyu love 2007-08-03 ch 13, | abuseshe said "not right now" so that means... later? haha |
| atreyu love 2007-08-03 ch 9, | abusenot a virgin anymore? :O |
| atreyu love 2007-08-03 ch 2, | abuseim reading this again ;] |