Wow

i readed it agian lol, jeez jen you write them so like, discriptive lol. i have one question how did she save the industry lol the whole thing confuses me i thought maybe there would be another chapter where, she would like tell why she did it and stuff but alas she dies in the end lol. YOU MUST TELL ME! much love gf :P rofl

Your writing is very powerful... The way you described what happened. Just lovely.

Is this a piece of another story? I know how it feels to have a single scene pop into your head, demanding to be written, without more in front of or behind it to make it an actual story. At any rate, this is pretty good! You have a knack for description, and aren't afraid to have people die: sacrifice is a must for any good story. If I may be so bold, this scene would probably have taken a bit more than five seconds... but I agree that even a few moments can seem to last an eternity. Keep up the good work!

amazing realism. :D