Heh, since I don't have children of my own, I do agree, once again, with all of your points. They're already passing a law that you can't hit your kid in public when they throw their little tantrums, which is stupid considering if it was my son who was throwing tantrums, the first thing I'd do is grab his hand and drag him out the store and hit him outside. If it was my teenage son, I'd probably beat his **. I don't have tolerance for people like that, especially 'stupid punk kids'.

~Snuffie

amen!i finally found someone who still has some sense on this planet.the human race might not be doomed after all

You are a DAMN fine writer. A bit of a bastard, I suppose, from previous rants, but any and all insults from you are so articulately and eloquently written that they just don't sound so harsh (still harsh, but humorous). My AP Lit teacher told me "If you can write like that, you are the **" (in reference to his favorite piece by Malamud). I don't mean to be "random" (as in your previous rant), because your writing obviously bears no connection to Malamud in any way, but you are the **. Thank you for gracing me with this refreshingly well-written rant! You are certainly going on my favorites list. Don't you dare look at anything I've written, I don't want to be flamed and I've already conceded that you hold the title of "the **" around here. I don't need you to compare anything of yours with mine. Write more. I'll be waiting for it.

Hmm, next time you need to take out your rage on something, do it on something that won't mean the end of the human race as we know it if you decide to destroy them all.

I could hardly tell when you were being sarcastic and when you weren't. But I can see that you have sometihng against kids who don't obey every order their parents issue. Is it really such a terrible thing to ignore your parents' orders once in a while? Huh?

Well I can see that you've lashed out not only at kids who don't want to be slaves to their parents, but kids who watch anime and go on the Internet. I'm starting to think you hate all kids, because I don't know anyone ages 6-13 who has never been on the Internet or seen an episode of dub Yu-gi-oh or Sailor Moon while chanel-surfing a few years ago, or yesterday or something.

My advice: see a counselor. DON"T. HAVE. KIDS. We don't see you doing long, tedious, soul-crushing, unrewarding, painful, and potentially dangerous jobs, do we? So (although you were most likely sarcastic) don't make your kids do it. If you even have a job, you don't do hard work, stuff that makes you cry, and pay your boss for it. If you really hate kids so much, come and hunt me down and kill me. I dare you to.

Go stick your head in a squirell hole or something, okay?

You are horrible, you are worse than a child molestor.

It is your opinion or not if you don't like kids, that is not the part that makes me crazy with anger. Kids are not for everyone

It's the part when you state what children are good for and what should happen to all of them. You're an ageist pig, like a racist Nazi insulting Jews, only thing your target is innocent children. Your broad sweeping analysis of children is despicable, rude, and heart wrenching to hear, and what I hate the most is that society AGREES with that outlook when it comes to children.

They are human beings, if you don't like them that is fine, but don't come on here, and insult them, treat them as sub human (like some childmolestor) and spread your hatred of them around.

Why don't you just kidnap one on the street, tie a rope around them connected to the back of your car, and just drag them down the highway, if you hate them so much!

AMEN to your essay! Last Saturday morning I had a sudden urge to turn on Cartoon Network and watch a couple of hours of Looney Tunes, but all that was on was anime. (Hmm...go figure...) So I turned to Nickelodeon, hoping for some good ol' Spongebob, but instead it was Jamie Lynn Spears with her show about how rich, snotty, bratty, stuck-up (not to mention...BLONDE!) 13-year-old friends with their laptops, motorized scooters, iPods, and boyfriends prance around boarding school like they rule the universe. On this show, ditzes are worshipped like they're goddesses and being air-headed is the "cool" thing. And the crap didn't stop there! There was a scrolling bar across the bottom with messages such as: "jamie lin rox" and "i luv nick & zoey101 and luv to watch it w/my homies all time."

Basically, between the lack of a decent public education system; the amount of TV children watch; the game systems (X-Boxes, PlayStations); computers; and the parents (and teachers) giving their kids whatever the hell they want, never bothering to discipline because, God forbid, they might hurt and/or alienate their kids (Personally, I think some parents are actually AFRAID of their kids!), our country is screwing itself. By glorifying the freaking idiots, we encourage them. And encouraging them is NOT a good thing! Besides, why would you want to encourage them when making fun of them is so much more fun?!

OK, I'm done. I think I'm going to go write my own essay now that I'm riled up. Nice piece, well written, very cynical (just like I like it!), and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

(If you like sarcastic, cynical pieces, try reading my "The Tale of the Baby Yetis." It's about popular fashion, so you should find it quite entertaining!)

Again, well-written, but I can't disagree more with your opinion on the belt. Allow me to explain.

I'm not a raving fundamentalist, but no child should deserve being hit with a belt — or anything, for that matter. If the kid gets out of line, the ol' timeout-and-privilege-deprivation is punishment enough for them. It might not last that long, but it'll give them something to think about. If you belt them, they'll never trust or respect you again. Fear leads to anger, which leads to hatred. Furthermore, the belted kid will have a good chance of growing up to be equally hurtful. What kind of parent would that make you, anyway?

This is the 21st century. Belting would be considered child abuse. Would you want to risk getting slammed by the law for it? I sure wouldn't.

But then, I'm not planning to have kids. Don't ask why.

I hope you think about this next time you hop into the sack without protection — if that ever happens.

P.S. You thought my essays were bland? Aw, poor baby. At least I don't advocate child abuse.

Nice and satirical. God, I love the people who can write well. Though I wouldn't count myself at the top, I'm okay...I hope.

But back to your writing, I think that you really did make a few points...like my mom is a pushover. I keep on telling her that I need some decent lectures and a severe allowance cut -she gives me $15.00 a week for keeping the kitchen, bathroom, living room, dining room and my room fairly clean, same to my not-very-helpful sister- when I break rules. Only problem is: she won't. But really, I'm doing okay...I trpped over my sister's guitar and broke it. I'm self-grounded for the rest of the month: no TV, deletion of the 30 minutes a month I get of video game time for the rest of the month, paying for the $250.00 replacement with money earned from external sources, and all allowance going towards stem cell research instead of my average 15%.

Cheer for sarcasm!

Most of the views of children nowadays (if not all) are so correct, it's not funny. Kids do need to learn a bit of respect for their elders. You have a good writing talent. Keep it up.

Yeh, I don't understand why so many people are disagreeing...look at our generations today. We throw temper tantrums in the middle of the street, and some kids have the nerve to scream and hit their parents. Lol, I think that the belt is the solution to a lot of these problems simply because it brings respect. Not trying to be biased or anything, but notice that not many black kids would risk slapping their parents or telling them to shut up because we were raised by the belt 24:7, and I'm sure many of us know the phrase "I brought you into this world, and I will sure as hell take you out of it", and they are dead serious. See how many kids would smack their parents :)

I think it was an awesome essay, and yeh guys, its in the comedy section for a reason. It's like semi-funny semi serious to me.

Good job.

I don't understand why people are disagreeing with this! Although, I think some of it is rather strict-- but that's why it's in the humour section. You made your point well, but some people are too stupid to understand. And, to enforce your theory, they're probably all of those contentious "punks". And, I definitely adore Wishbone. Every day after school I watched it, I read his books, and even had a stuffed animal of him.

And to answer your question in your review of my feminist piece, of course I'd be offended if I were hired for looks over talent, I think I even said it blantantly... unless it was a post for a model or something of course. Which I've already been through. Perhaps it was the pretentious supposed feminism of all the mindless Liberal girls that surrounded me in modeling that gave me my staunch Republican look on jobs and how women are treated. I should have mentioned Condeleeza Rice somewhere in there, but it was an essay for a mainly Democrat university.

I hope you never have children.

Geez, you must've been **-whipped by life so badly that you can't take it anymore and you had to put trash like this for the whole world to see.

You're a laugh riot Mr. logical-unreason.

Brilliance. Hilarity. I lurve you.
I don't like kids...most of that sounds good to me.
let's take over the world and make all of that come true! Just imagine...::gets all dreamy::