most excellent. it had alot of mystery, makes you wonder why she was so special. if it was just cuase she was the first kill, or is it something more?

That really good. I really like the part where you said "evermore". It kinda reminds me of the poem "The Raven"
Nice job.
~Shinagami~
(Queen of )

that almost brought a tear to my eye it was so sad...great poem!!

very beautifully written and very touching. excellent job. i can't find anything wrong with it. the rhythm is good, the words are used well, there are no errors that i can find. excellent job! :-)

i liked this one very much. I hope this poem wasnt written because someone did something to you .. if so may that person live and end his life in that treacherous, horrid guilt .. very descriptive .. and all the emotions ! i love it ..

wow, that was good! very deep too. it was as if i was him and i felt his emotion (well at least partially)

Another great poem written. Good work.
-Seras

the rhyme sceme was subtle and touching. the wording was carefully chosen and beautiful. i loved this. this is really a fantastic piece of work, keep it up.

you describe well. a nice poem even though it was about death in a way.

wow, this was so well described. keep up the great work=0)

i like your poem. the rhymes dont sound forced at all. moreover, the imagery is fantastic. you have captured grief suspended in a brief passage of time. keep it up!

blinkie