That was really good and hope you write more unless this was a one-shot. Your description was awsome, and I was able to see every detail of it. Great job!

That's the end? Well I think you should write more, because it's really good!

it has great description. your sentances are kinda funny in places. you add commas to places and then dont add them to the places where they should be if you put them in the first place...does that make any sense to you? hehe. sorry, my thoughts are a bit garbled today. there is, once again, great description, but think about this. they both just happen to be out and about at the same time? if they are, you are describing things like a narrator and not what they are thinking besides observing their movements and speech which is good, but add what they are thinking if you can.. or whatever. the story sounds interesting. hope you add more ^_^