This is a nice story. Short stories can be difficult to write, but yours turned out very good. I liked the ending with the mother, and my attention didn't waver throughout your writing. I've been meaning to check out your story Chosen, but I have yet to find the time to read all of the chapters. But I promise you I will read all of it, it'll just take time. (77 chapters worth of time)
See ya!

Aww, that is so sweet (lol). You are a good writer, good at portraying ideas and feelings. This is such a good story! I'm glad you had to write this story because it's really good :D

Aw! What a cute story! I really liked it! Really sweet and great moral!!

Heh.. this has got to be one of thoes few moral fics that I actually like. It refrained from being too cliched, and the moral itself was portrayed very nicely. You must have gotten a good grade on this. ^^
~Blizz

I like this. It was short and sweet. You didn't too much time in any one spot and therefore held my attention completly. The idea was good too. Two thumbs up!

Although it's rather short, it's a nice story! It caught my eye and kept me reading from the beginning to the end without stopping! Keep up the good work, okay? ^_~

BTW, Happy Birthday in advance! Yahoo, let's celebrate!(Now I wish someone would wish me like this =P)

Hii! OOh, this is great!! I really wish your teacher had assigned a long story instead of a short one. This is very interesting. When I read the end, my mouth dropped open, and I sat there for a few minutes with my jaw on the ground. Yay! OOh, can I do fanart? I really want to draw Detrius. He sounds hot. ^_^ Maybe draw a full-demon as well. Ok. I have to start reading the Chosen now. Ja!

oh, the ending gave me goosebumps.

this was really creative and i liked it bunches, i wish there had been more. if i were you i would try and make it a longer story, if ideas come to you. one thing thay u cant do in a short story that u can in a long one is show instead of tell. at the start it sounded more school-assignement esk than the end, just because you had to explain everything so we would know instead of being able to show it through actions during different chapters.

at any rate, this was good. ESPECIALLY for a school assignement story

~color outside the lines~

This is good!! I like it!

Aha. Noticed you added a story. If you wish it to be a long story, why not turn it into one?

This is a different style than I'm used to seeing from you. It has a bit more of a fairy tale sort of style. I can't entirely explain it. Actually it vaguely reminds me of the style Tolkien began The Hobbit with. It has the slight feel of a children's story.

It's a good story, and I think it's good as a stand alone, and could also be very good if you wanted to expand upon it.

Very fairy-tale-like if you leave it as is. :)

tis i - fLaMer101! i'll be revewing under this name from now on, im just not signed in. this was a wonderful short story. i loved it! it had a great plot and everything. i wish it just wasn't a one-shot thing. but maybe you could make it into something more? (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). as i said before, this is a great story!