Hi Laura!
Great poem! I love the metaphors you used! Are you refering to God?... If not, who? Very cool. I liked how you wrote this in all lowercase letters!
-Becky

Hi Laura...
I like this poem, i like how u put emotion into it because you can actually feel whats going on

Hi there. A really good poem. Seems desolate and despondent in how it just runs together with no capital letters or punctuation, (I mean like periods at the end of sentences).
I think the third to last stanza is somewhat awkward in his rhythm.
I like it though, particularly the last two lines.

-Izzy J.

i love it.. its really beutiful...

...

Laura, I am in utter shock.

This is an absolute burst of brilliance -- only, it shouldn't be described that way, as it's more...despairing, than "bursting"...

Good GOSH this is AWESOME.

I mean, truly. This work is gorgeous, and I am so jealous, I shan't even begin.

...

Wow-oh-wow. I am so amazed.

(*Clicks favorite stories list*)