I love all the fluid, vivid, descriptive words that helped the piece to just fit together very well. Also, I thought the scheme (3 lines) worked especially well with your thoughts in this poem. Nice work.

Hm...I am still trying to figure this out. Maybe you just swim deeper than I can hold my breath to go. ;D Excellent job.

~*~AbunaiChikara

You did such a great job on this. Describing the eyes, heart, and mind made this really effective.


~Heart of the Sword

Wow, somehow this poem really stood out to me. The opening lines, immediately drew me in. It didn't throw in any fancy words or any cliche approach at despair. In its own unique way, it has this strength and intensity to it, which is what makes this poem so excellent.

You did an excellent job on this. I can definatly relate. Life is a bit of a fascade, isn't it?

OMFG!! The last part was like...:O amazing. you can write dude. Like WOW. alright dude, i have to say, you gotta do this professionaly, cuz DAMN. I feel so goddamn inferior!! :O okay well review my ** poem sometime! bye!