Awesome poem! I loved the way you worded it...but I especially liked the ending!

I like the blunt simplicity of your poems, you tell the truth but not in cryptic words or angst like some (or me for that matter) its nice. Great work!

Interesting poem...I like the last stanza best. Out of curiousity, have you ever tried sonnets? You seem to write a lot of rhymed poetry, so I'm interested to see ho wyou would handle something a bit more structured.
lyv
p.s.
you asked about haiku...yes, I'm perfectly aware that they're 5-7-5. Spliced haiku was an experiment, literally splicing two (5-7-5) haiku together, one in regular text and one in italics. There's a few other variations on the form that you'll commonly find especially on this site, like "cut" haiku (7-5-3-1) and 3-5-3 haiku, which are technically more like the orignial Japanese haiku. In addition, some people (not me) write katauta (5-7-7) and post it there, or a series of haiku put together around a common theme (I've written a few of these..."Covenant" is one.) Oh, and you'll also find tanka (5-7-5-7-7) and choka (5-7-5-7-5...7-7), which are also traditional Japanese forms similar to the haiku. Just so you know _

Wow. That was really good. I wish I could make a poem like that, but I can't make a poem worth spitting on. I really like this one. I really do.

Were you trying to scare me? it worked this shits awesome.

*shudders* very freaky but very GOOD!

Kiara Renee

u r me, eh? so tell me: if ur me, and u know so much, then why WHY am i such a horrible person sometimes?

wow very powerful poem, i loved it! keep up the good work, by the way i like the way it just flowed right along...

**brooke d**

oh wow. i just read a book by anne rice (Blackwood Farm-it is the book that i based my poem 'grave' on. thats where i got vampires, anyways,) and this reminds me a LOT of it. its kind of eerie. oh wells, i love it. :)

WICKED! theres only that to say, this is just... COOL! really, awesome, lol, i love it, like everything else, but this is so... urgh, brilliant work! love and good luck. Twilight

Fantastic flow, and rhyme scheme, too. The second to last line you have a missing word. Perhaps it's suppose to be "And you know deep inside that"? Intriguing thought behind the poem.

-Izzy J.

wow... that was interesting! very very interesting... but it sorta make sense... at least to me it does. it was really good, i like the way it flowed. great job!

Jen