Wow! the last line really pulls it together, wonderfully. Favs

"Something you can't stand."
Suggestion, I think the poetry would be nicer if all lines of the poetry had the same amount of beats.. so maybe... understand would be better?
"To show you the way."
maybe 'show you the right way.' would make the sentence more complete.
I hope I helped, but I really did enjoy this poem. Please don't get offended.

I liked~ very nicely done :D

Wow..amazed by this poem. You started off with some violent lines, with the darkness and feeling oppressed I guess you could say. "just a sudden silence, something you can't stand" that's definitely a good line there. I like how you changed the mood and tone by the end into something more 'happy' I guess you could say. The last three lines sound really romantic. Good poem, it flowed very nicely and sounds wonderful read aloud :) Good work, keep it up for sure.

*Jenna*

its really nice! i love the poem! its sweet. =)

and thanks for all ur reviews. i too agree that tristan should be given a kick to the moon :)

AW!! That was so SWEET! I love this poem! Great job!

it did come out nice, it doesn't always flow perfectly, but very little does.

oh, this is so cool, i really like your usr of words, i ove ryming poems.
keep it up
-fio

hey! this is so good! this is like...total opposite of your other poems. you were thinkin bout you know who werent you lol. yeah dun lie lol. i thought this was cute i wuv it. keep up the good work :D
luv summer