Reviews for Royal Trepidations
Megger McGreggor 1/25/04 . chapter 1
First of all, I love the title of the story. _
Aw, poor thing. She had to wear an ugly dress. *cracks up* I had to wear one for my 6th grade graduation and it made me look like an old lady. O_O
Hahaha, her mom made her ANOTHER dress? How sad!
Short, but sweet beginning.
*Megan*
sorcerer 1/25/04 . chapter 16
ohmigosh i have missed so much! damn stupid computer! but now i'm back! do not fret! and i love this story more than ever! torrine sounds like one sexy beast-m torrine. anyway, UPDATE real soon
sorahane-hime 1/24/04 . chapter 16
that is so creepy! i said drools, not drols, and mushroom soup is good, nott god! why do my reviws always mess up like that? anyways i feel your pain. i'm in double AP and homework sucks
sorahane 1/24/04 . chapter 15
yep! its me! sora-hime, sorahane-hime, and sora are all the same person. sorry if i confused you. Cool chapter, but that was a totall waste of mushroom soup. *drols*
mushroom soup is god!
keep it up minna! great chapter
shampoOoO 1/23/04 . chapter 16
your writing about Torrine made me think of his as well , lucky Aradia!
..I was a bit sad when you rewrote the chapter again but then got excited when it was with Aradia's style . hope you can get the other chapter soon..
who cares4 1/22/04 . chapter 16
update the reviews are so pass 200 so upate now!
XxDragon Princess NikkixX 1/22/04 . chapter 15
Oh wow. Oh wow, oh wow, oh wow. I am in awe. I am so jealous of you! It makes me wonder why the hell you are reading my story. Mines a JOKE compared to this. It so great! I LOVE this Torrine and Aradia thing you got going here. God, it's so horribly tense i am about ready to smack you upside the head, got it? *muahahahahhaha* I need a new chapter! It was nice seeing it from Aradia's point of view. Very nice. BUT i want to move on! I am just so curious as to how Torrine and Aradia will get over their whole hate thing and create a love from that. And and and. . .how will Torrine's girlfriend react? Eh? lol! Please update soon. You're doing a great job. It'd be so cruel to leave me in suspense like this *wails* *hugz* luv ya hunni!
Nikki
XxDragon Princess NikkixX 1/22/04 . chapter 14
OMG OMG OMG OMG! I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS STORY. I AM IN LOVE WITH IT! DO YOU HEAR ME? AH!
*clears throat* I. . .must. . .read. . .on. . .
Nikki
XxDragon Princess NikkixX 1/22/04 . chapter 12
Okay, honestly. I think you could get this published. It is wonderful! Fantastic! Amazing! This world that you have created is just so magical and wonderful. You haven't left anything out, you haven't faltered in your writing. It continues to draw me in more and more until i am just tearing to the next chapter. GREAT JOB! I did notice a few minor error's that you might want to fix in future chapters. . . I will use a few examples from your writing to illustrate what you are doing wrong and how to fix it:
1.“I almost forgot” Said Benair. * The correct punctuation for quotations would make this look like: "I almost forgot," said Benair. Notice the comma after 'forgot' and the small 's' instead of the captial.
“And you’ve made JUURNI in FIVE years?” He asked a bit shocked. * Likewise, this should be: “And you’ve made JUURNI in FIVE years?” he asked a bit shocked. No comma because the punctuation is just fine, but still no capital 'h.' The only time that a captial should be present after a quotation is when it's a noun that follows.(i.e. Benair)
“The Lyy have assembled.” Began the Head Mage. * Try not to put a period inside the quotation if you can help it. 'began the head mage' is not a complete sentence and therefore this is improper punctuation. This should be written as: "The Lyy have assembled," began the Head Mage. It flows a lot better and is in the correct form. Exclamation points and question marks are okay inside quotations that are followed by 'someone said' but a period is not in most cases.
Blah. I hate the quotation stuff and i really don't know it all either, but this is what i do know. It would be good to apply it because then everything would be PERFECT and you will have learned something that helps your writing!
Well, i'm gonna go finish now! Who!
Nikki
Prantis - Queen of Hearts 1/22/04 . chapter 15
oh goody! *rubs hands together evilly*
theyre gonna make such a cute couple... wondering who stopped the soup...
pixy-dizzy 1/22/04 . chapter 16
*growls* hates me...it wouldn't let me review the chapter before this...Oh well.
Yes, I LUURVE Court Duel...I mean, Crown Duel is good too, but I have a secret love of nobility/courts/beaUteeful gowns...you get my gist. .;
*giggle* Yes, you did FANTASTIC on the description of Torrine...now I want my own Torrine...And I can just imagine his face when he saw the soup!
Hmm...I wonder who stopped the soup from burning Torrine's face? Well, I suppose it's for the better, because we wouldn't want Torrine's yummy good looks ruined now, would we?
Cheers!
(Oh man, I'm so sorry for the long review...)
SunWindPrincess 1/22/04 . chapter 16
LOVED IT! Don't worry about the other chapters (switing the tenses and all) You should probably do that after you finish the story.
Couldn't helb being nozy, I noticed that dizzydragon n u both Love Crown Duel! Did I already tell you I loved that story! Court Duel of course more because of the letter courtship!
LOL bout the whole dissappearing act. I had thought that I had put you on my author alert list and when an e-mail didn't come I didn't think you had updated, not to mention I had midterms all last week and wasn't allowed n e where near the computer! LOL
I'm sending the 2 chapters and prologue that I have written, my teacher wants me to edit 1 and 2 before I finish 3, I've started working on that a bit but haven't finished! ha ha
Yup Highschool is deffinitley a PAIN! URR, too many tests!
I'll send Jason over just as soon as Orlando arrives ha ha! OMG my World Cultures teacher is great, he said we could go on a field trip to see TROY! HAHA
YUPPERS TORRINE IS DEFINITELY YUM! HAHA I love shaggy hair/curly/wavy guy hair *dreamy sigh* yuppers that's just wonderful. Romance huh, better get that started girl! ha ha
I hope that your friend is doing ok! When are you going to update? Must update! You need to update! Updating is god! Just like Orlando is precious. ha ha couldn't resist.
* Sun Wind Princess *
Allyson903 1/22/04 . chapter 15
YAY! some more Torrine and Aradia! lol, tsk tsk bickering again, some people never learn :), especially when the guy you're flirting with is hot! Oh and about the beta thing i'll try and send a chapter your way once i get it written which might be a while cause of school and soccer conditioning, bleh. Anyways can't wait till the next chapter
Allyson
Trinity of Dreams 1/22/04 . chapter 16
loved it, torrine sounds so yummy.
u must update soon, i hope aradia and torrine hook up.
kelyn 1/22/04 . chapter 15
Yeah i loved his description. I thought the good and bad side of her were funny as well. Although it would have been nice to have read more new stuff instead of just reading everything over again in her point of view. But it was still really good and funny.
K
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