FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Thomas Rex 2007-10-22 ch 1,   | Very true indeed; we so easily forget for what we're fighting. Yet there are some things that make sense in context and there are some things that do not. Wow, that was confusing, sorry. God bless you. |
| Marching Flutist 2004-01-04 ch 1, | Beautiful, simply beautiful. |
| Magentian 2003-11-17 ch 1, | Y'know, reading this, I got the strangest urge for some chocolate-covered cherries. But that's off-topic. This may just be the most true-to-heart poem you've ever published. Although the verses themselves lack flair, they do get the message across, and it's a message worth saying. I especially liked the stanzas near the end: I force nothing upon you For this is why I write: To try and help those who are lost Not to try and start a fight Let it be known that I’m confused It’s the same for you and I We’ve both laughed and loved and lost Both, under the same sky The message of tolerance included in those stanzas was comforting to hear from a Catholic, and the entire poem smacked of the Brotherhood of Mankind, which (outside of Grapes of Wrath) is definitely a motif that is too seldom used. The paragraphs on suffering don't merely depict the angst seen in your earlier works- they serve to bolster your point, yet, in keeping with the almost-weary tone (established especially well in the last paragraph), they didn't take away from the rest of the poem or add a feeling of languidness. This translates to, you're getting much better at knowing when to turn off the burner. That's something which many people struggle with. All in all, I'm definitely proud of you on this one. The reverence within the verses was not exaggerated, but measured and hopeful. Above all, it was easy to perceive your sincerity in this piece; although that may be partially due to the fact that I know you already, from what I've seen of the reviews, the other readers, too, have caught on to the fact that this poem stands apart from the others as being a moment of definite, personal truth. Very well done. |
| Getuie 2003-11-16 ch 1, | 'But if you find yourself like this If you find yourself at all Try and give it up to God He’ll help you if you fall' I really liked this stanza... Overall I found the poem open, honest and right from the heart of the writer... well done |
| Scarlett Red Rose 2003-11-16 ch 1, | Beautiful and truthful...Keep up the great writing! Happy writing! ~SRR~ |