Oh my.

And do update, this is SUCH a cliffhanger.

One critique-- the football players are all really blurbed together for me. Except Rocky. But I can't tell them apart-- if you ever revise this story, I'd try to give them more distinctive personalities.

Again, very interesting. Henry has a very strongly developed science-fiction-videogamer personality that is, if cliched, quite amusing when it shows as he supposes Mary Kay is a conspiracy to take over the world... "one compact at a time".

The descriptions of the banana's popularity at the beginning of the chapter set a good tone for what's happening at the school, etc. as well as being amusing.

Whoa.

Chewbaca. That's cool. And I don't even know how to spell it.

My brother named our computers... the slow family one is PIGMAN, and his is Molacious (I think he means malicious, but whatever)...

Anyways, it's spiffiful.

"...while Gregory helped Rocky into the giant suit that Henry had no idea how they found."

I love that line.

Anyways, another good chapter. Shorter, but that's okay. You're moving along at an excellent pace.

I love this story, I really do. It's very well written, and has an obvious lead to a plotline-- I love it. And I love bananas, which was part of the reason that I decided to read this story.

But yeah. And then I'll check out your other work too.

You didn't finish your story! ARG!

good good good even better than when we wrote together! yeah u always were the better so all that i expected!