 SubliminalMsgs 2004-04-01 . chapter 1...ok...too much punctuation...u really dont need all those commas...very nice emotion/thought behind it...not presented just as nicely though...u might want a more extensive vocabulary... |
 Laksha 2004-02-26 . chapter 1Your work is awesome, don't stop now or ever! |
 Winter's Roar 2004-02-09 . chapter 1oh, i think most of us can relate to that. I love the phrasing "someone bigger and better than me", very honest. I know i can completely relate to wanting what those "perfect" people in the magazines seem to have, but in reality they aren't perfect, have bad days, and many of them don't have the greatest ideals or morals. Anyways, that was off the subject. Wondeful job with this poem!
~ winter |
 JustForgetMe 2004-01-18 . chapter 1i can relate to this..but it doesnt rhyme or flow?..its good in a way..and you don't really need all them commas..otherwise it is good.. |
 me 2004-01-14 . chapter 1 wow...that was...wow...i think you just made my brain flat line |
 AngelaiR 2004-01-14 . chapter 1Ok, I am going to let you down nicely. Yes, you'd think we'd stop reading your poetry and give you a break from such horrible reviews but sorry to say, you seem to need the lessons.
Beautiful idea, but not so beautiful poem. Over punctuated as usual and as expected. Lets see, a vocabulary enlargment seems neccesary, and something done to uniform the syllables. Good Luck next time.
starzstruck and lilpeeps |
 wastedlovexxx 2004-01-10 . chapter 1this poem is ** |
 MindTear 2003-12-27 . chapter 1*sigh* notice a pattern? NO COMMAS! NO CLICHÉS! ADD SOME ELEMENTS! sheesh. ruin ruin ruin ruin. |
 everlasting-euporia 2003-12-26 . chapter 1im not sure what the title or the first line has to do with the rest of the poem and i dont fully understand why theres a hatred theme. |
 aconsciousjulia 2003-12-14 . chapter 1hmm...your words ring true...good good very good my dear
*jules* |
 TheReatdedMaleB*tch is too lazy to sign in 2003-12-10 . chapter 1 weariness had caught me long before. hating. tired of hating. the tiredness will always leave a bitter taste in the mouth. |
 deepdown 2003-12-10 . chapter 1i know what you mean, but if you were to be them then you probably would spend your life wishing to be someone less. the key to happiness is being happy with who you are - it is something you cannot change, so spending your life wishing to be someone, something that you cannot be will only make you miserable. try to be happy. sad people make me sad... |
 Ronin Rabbit 2003-12-08 . chapter 1It's a feeling I've felt too, I know that I can't improve my own life if i concentrate on hating others for what I don't have...but it's just so hard.
But what the speaker might not realize is that those people in the magazines aren't necessarily real, those ideals they represent aren't their reality either.
I like it, straight to the point with the feeling of longing strongly attached. |
 cosmo-queen 2003-12-07 . chapter 1Good poem. Short and to-the-point. I can relate to this, I've felt this many times before. Keep up the good work :)
*cosmo-queen* |
 simpleplan13 2003-12-03 . chapter 1wow.. very true.. i can definately relate... |