*smiles* very nice. it isn't a typical romance poem... no silly trite sap at all. it's absolutely lovely, and the word choice is perfect. you convey emotion wonderfully. bravo!

The descriptions and imagery in this is fantastic. A very dark romance is portrayed in this, in my mind. Great, great job, and keep it up.
~Lidless Eye

Very, very cool. "If sleep did not lure me to rest, I would lie / Always awake and think of him as my love." I know the feeling... Awesome job...

Ah, what a wonderful website this is when people can leave six line reviews. ;o)
But yeah, it helps for me to imagine this since I was there. And you described this perfectly! Nice, evocative language, though perhaps a little laconic. Other than that, very good. :o)

interesting.. i love the first stanzza