That was wonderful! The way you handled the concept was admirable, and the new rhythm was a nice change in pace. Please keep writing!
~The One and Only

hmm... i have a friend that i think can relate... 'cept i ain't dying, i'm movin... of couse you could've meant the poem to mean something entirely different to what im thinking... hm...
~DB http://w.fictionpress.com/~dragnbreth