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| MrBillyD 2007-08-25 ch 1,  | abuseThis is an excellent story. While the narrator is obviously suffering from some mental illness, he is also very believable. If you want to have a career as a professional writer, I'm sure you'd do very well. |
| Silver Finger 2006-07-26 ch 1, | abusewow...this was sick, I liked it. It kinda felt like a day dream gonw to hell. That was kool |
| poet tree 2005-05-21 ch 1, | abuseHow comic, in a darkly ironic sort of way. I like this story best, so far. Good job. |
| Will Heydt-Minor 2005-03-25 ch 1, | abuseThis reminds me of being a teenager. ;) Seriously though, I found this to be a very entertaining story, almost in a blackly comic sort of way. Once again, your sentences are nearly perfect in design, in length and composition they compliment each other very well. Your desciptions, are very vivid, but not to the point of grotesqueness that so many modern authors seem to love. When I have more time I plan to move onto some of your larger works. I swear it. |
| Teratoma 2004-06-16 ch 1, | abuseWow, stunning. I loved the use of similies and such. |
| m maldonado 2004-02-14 ch 1, | abuseExceptional. Favorite bit right here: "Looking out the window, I watched as the road passed by in a dark grey blur. I smiled as I saw the grey blur shift and lessen, giving way to a green one. The bus rocked back and forth violently, unstable on the road of nature's design. I could feel the swerve of the wheels as the bus driver desperately tried to get the bus back onto concrete. It didn't matter, I knew the wheels were useless now. They were following another path. My path. I was trapped no longer. Not to the confines of generic reality or of the tyrannical hold of the bus. I controlled the bus. Now it would go where I saw fit." That last line is especially nice. Keep it up. Oh, and Happy Valentine's Day. m |
| Endless Nightmares 2004-02-09 ch 1, | abuseWow!- Man, this is crazy, and so well written. Disturbing read, but you wrote so excellent, I see a lot of stories that are going to be great from you. Makes me think twice about riding a school bus, just thinking about it, thats just creepy, and eerie. Whispers In Silence |
| Rachkmar 2004-02-08 ch 1, | abuseDamn. Excellently written. Not too long, not too short, damn fine descriptions. Keep writing. |
| wazawaisuru 2004-02-05 ch 1, | abuseAwesome story! Really well-written, I love your descriptions. Nice work. |
| Anna 2004-02-05 ch 1, anon. | abusedam man... that was a good story.. i like it.. when are you gonna make another chapter? |