I absolutely love this story!

x
Ali

happy ending...

thank you, i really need that (bit depressy for a couple of days now)... haha

i dont know if you're still active or not but i would like you to know that you're a great writer...

xoxo

Ekk.
Finally! Yes.
Stupid traiter perv is finally dead.
And they are finally together.
Love it.

Haydens a good friend.

Ah. Gah. Freak. Blehh.

Aw
I love the flashback.

aww...good and bad situation.
he's going back, but not as himself.
but good chapter.
stupid, stupid fenix.
how could he!?
bleh. good writing.

i hate him.
i hate him.
i hate him.
malloy i mean.
good chapter.
but i hate him.

this can't be good.
good chapter.
poor little girl.
and fenix.

O.O

i swear this chapter made me misty-eyed.
but i really like your writing.
i still hate mallor. hate. hate. hate.

i'm actually going to review every chapter...or try to at least.

the ending was a bit rushed,
and you should have made clear
the time period that had passed
between when he was beaten to being healed.
wounds don't heal that fast
if his back was freakin' raw
then how could he even move?

there was a big misunderstanding about that,
and if you had written about aiur's feelings
more, and have her hold out for a little longer,
it would have been more dramatic.

first she says 'i hate you you bitch'
and then she's like 'iloveyoutoo'

the end, it's like you almost forgot that
he was in pain, all bandaged and stuff.

i love the story and jack, haha.

wow i swear sometimes aiur can be so frustratingly dense. her self-denial makes me want to punch her in the face. i think she deserves a fate like malloy.


other than that side note, good story

Not bad, wish there was some description of the battle though. Dragged on a bit in the middle - overall 7/10.