Meh, can't wait for us to get to this stage of Coursework, for at the moment it's analyzing other peoples work, when I'd much rather be writing my own stuff. But we'll get there eventually.
Anyway, back to this piece. You always write with such description, paying particular attention to the Senses (more notably on this piece). You make the smallest piece of time seem like an eternity, and the reader becomes almost part of it.
It's very well written, as always.
-Carrie