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| Ember's Fire 2005-05-10 ch 12,  | abuseGAH!! Must - stop - crying!! That was so SAD!! I think the reason it affected me so hard was becuase there are children all around the world who live in a life like this. (something I refer to in one of my poems...) I loved the ending, perfectly fit. Good job! ~Ember's Fire~ |
| Decimaster321 2004-12-30 ch 12, | abuseThat was a beautiful, sad story. It hit me especially hard because I'm a little depressed right now... Anyway. Very well written, and it had an extremely heavy, anxious feeling sometimes. I loved it. By the way, I read it all in one sitting, I couldn't stop reading! Good job. |
| lilleo 2004-10-20 ch 12, | abusehey, id like to say that is a really moving and well written story. I think i will re-read it all at once, clever title too :) |
| lilleo 2004-05-30 ch 10, | abusehey that is a really sad, but well writte. Are you going to carry on or leave it there? i dont htink it matters either way, but well done! |
| Show-Your-True-Colours 2004-04-29 ch 6, | abusesorry. i meant to review for a while. This story is really sad but extreemly well written. the drips of water sound like chinese water torture etc. please continue! |
| TheatrePhunk 2004-03-29 ch 4, | abuseNo! Leave Braiden alone! Poor guy... Update soon, please! |
| TheatrePhunk 2004-03-23 ch 3, | abuseDon't you just want to give Braiden a big hug? :( Please continue... So good, yet so sad... |
| TheatrePhunk 2004-03-16 ch 2, | abuseAww, the poor darling... It's so sad. Please continue. |
| Gilee7 2004-03-15 ch 2, | abuseI like the ending and I liked the chapter overall, but you need to reword some things. I live in NC, a state where nobody truly knows proper english, but even I could spot several improper words. And you did the parenthesis (that how u spell it) again. It seemed out of place in the first ch. and it did in this one as well. But overall, good story, good writing; it just needs a little editing. |
| Gilee7 2004-03-15 ch 1, | abusePretty good. You seem to be a talented writer. Good descriptions and wording and all that other neat stuff. "Creeping back into his make-shift bed (really just a tattered mattress resting on the splintered floorboards)" I think you could describe his bed without having to put it into parenthesis like that. It kinda of sticks out and doesn't go right with the rest of the story; and that's not a good thing. |
| TheatrePhunk 2004-02-29 ch 1, | abuseAww, the poor guy! I feel so bad for him... ::snivels:: Please update! |
| Show-Your-True-Colours 2004-02-29 ch 1, | abuseThat is a really sad story. It sounds like it will be good. Please continue! :) |