excellent! the rhyme scheme and short rhythmed lines drew me into your world very quickly, and i felt myself compelled to read further and faster. i very much like the not-obvious reference to "ring around the rosy", and the repetition of the first quatrain at the end of the poem bookends it very nicely. two thumbs up!
-claire

wow. i love the detail. when reading this poem, i could perfectly visualize this dead guy. you are very talented... keep writing.

This poem is very dark and morbid...I love it. Have to say that edgar allen poe is my favorite poet. Wonderful rhyme sceme. Keep writing. You have talent.
-Aradia

Very well done. I don't see anything that should be changed, awesome job!

This is really sad stuff. I get depressed just reading the first couple of lines. Not that that's bad or anything. . . it's got a good rhythm to it.
*meg