A little repetitive with black in there twice, but I think your scheme was fine. A (Americanized version) Haiku actually does best when the format is,

Short
Long
Short

So long as your total syllable count is seventeen or less it's fine. I like the way you experimented with this, I just think you should look for a few more descriptive words. Though it may still be correct, most every Haiku author on her prefers 5-7-5, I guess I'm just an exception. Nice job!

~~Franken~~

Odd. Interesting. Minimalistic. But too short in my opinion ... like a 7-5 scheme.