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Reviews For: My Life In One Sentence - Reviews: Page 1 of 25

iFly
2008-08-07
ch 18,
abuseI love this story! I can't believe it's over already! Keep Writing
X.Imperfect.Girl.X
2008-07-05
ch 18,
abuseThe whole story itself was fairly good. It had a great sense in keeping a person’s attention. And although Brayden’s personality could be quite negative at times, I’m glad she has finally taking that risk.

The only thing that I questioned was the genre, you held it under humor- although I agree there were little bubbly moments, I would have still put it in romance.
Nichole Green
2008-06-17
ch 18, anon.
abuseI loved this story...My favorite part about the whole story, was how Brayden's character didn't falter and become someone else. You are a very good author, and I deeply encourage you to write more, because from this story alone, you one of the few authors now that don't give in to the average story line.

I hope you have pleasure in writing more stories and that they are all as good as this one.
Layla the fiend
2008-03-16
ch 11,
abuseI think Brayden should wear brass knuckles around for future incidents. It would hurt a lot less.
Layla the fiend
2008-03-13
ch 6,
abuseYou need to do more in Matt's point of view.
Layla the fiend
2008-03-12
ch 1,
abuseI LOVE Abbot and Costello!! And I am also one hundred percent addicted to the glory of video games. I love this, though. It's very well written and well thought out, unlike the vast majority of stories on FictionPress.

200 HP

Yes, I'm a nerd.
Kathryn
2008-02-21
ch 1, anon.
abuseLook, don't take offense but their is absolutely nothing grabbing about your first chapter. It sounded like your story might be a vaguely interesting read and generally I stick with a story until the 3rd chapter (at this point generally the scene is set, the plot is flowing normally and if it isn't worth reading by then it isn't going to be) however I couldn't bring myself to read past your first chapter.
You sound like you didn't write it in order for people to read it, however I just thought you might like an opinion, take it or leave it.
As I said the first chapter is boring, it's just a self-centred, angsty teenager who thinks she's special, mysterious and mistunderstood whining about her life. Ok it's realistic as most teenagers are like that, but generally lead characters have some redeeming qualities like being atypical in some facet of their personality or behaviour, being put into a situation that forces a change or the realism is perfect and they are described in such a way to allow you to empathise and see how they think.
My main problem is that this chapter has none of these things, within minutes it is obvious it's just an egotistic girl who thinks she is far more intelligent and mature than she actually is.
To be honest it sounds like this is you, or who you imagne yourself as, perhaps who you'd like to be, but by doing that you omit all of the weaknesses and eccentricities that make people natural and likeable, there is no emotion, no connection and no depth. (I may be completely wrong, I don't know you, but that is how it reads)
You wrote this for you and not for the story or people you want to portray (however horribly cliche that sounds)so if you actually want to write seriously I suggest writing someone who isn't another version of yourself, who is not remarkably similar to you and doing some serious, in depth, character studies.
jlr
2007-11-04
ch 3,
abuseI am sorry Brayden had so much trouble in her English class. In an English never had such a one sided discussion of any topic, including love. You do a good job of conveying her frustration that she has to endure that pain.
Ladybugg13
2007-10-27
ch 18,
abuseThat was awesome!

Somehow, the slightly cheesy ending fit. Because it wasn't really a fairy tale ending. The main conflict was resolved, but the side stories wern't. Allie broke up with her prince charming. April is still retarded. Her parents are still nuts. Her life can still go on after the stories over. That's the way it should be.

-Bugg
FalseReflections
2007-10-22
ch 18,
abuse*sniffs* You have no idea how much this story touched me. No, not because i'm like Brayden but i've never truly been in love before so...yeah. Oh, and the ending was perfect, partly because its raining here, now, too and the atmosphere is just perfect. I do, however, have a friend like Alli. Except for the climbing into windows thing. I live on the eleventh floor. And i'm glad you didn't turn this into some cheesy, sunshine and daisies thingy. I think the fact that Brayden is '..willing to try..' is less conventional(not unheard of) but it is the most fitting nontheless.

I think my favourite character is Grandma. Is that weird?
Saranya
2007-10-19
ch 8, anon.
abuseYou do know that roosters are male and therefore CAN'T lay eggs, right? So that riddle is completely redundant.
his-skinnyDOLL
2007-08-27
ch 18,
abuse:D Have I ever mentioned how much I adore this story? I love your characters, esp. Brayden and Matt... because who could not adore them? Thanks for introducing me to Stutterfly. XD
ophelia
2007-08-25
ch 18, anon.
abusehow can a girl who loved her grandpa soo much claim to not believe in love...?
XMizzFeFeX
2007-08-24
ch 18,
abuseoy i loved the whole story, the morbidity, the poetry (especially the poetry), the stupidty, the comedy, okay now i am just rythming unnecessarily, but that doesnt matter they were all to cute i loved everyone.

i love your sense of humor, hehe. i reely like all the poems u put in the story.

u did an awesome job!
ruby
2007-08-06
ch 18, anon.
abusei liked this story, it was in a way typical/cliche, if you know what i mean. when you have the new boy who suddenly interested in the depreseed loner like girl and within chapters you know theyll have a life changing experiece and if the author is a happy person who likes happy endings, itll end with them together or overcoming the problem. BUT i liked it all the same, because come on what is originality but a twist of the old. i think i liked it because of the emotions that were involved and how i didnt want to stop reading after a couple of chapters. anyone can write a cliched story but there are only so many that can make you re-feel the feelings. anyways good job, and like most people i could just wish i had fast enough wit like your main character =)
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