|
|
| Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Dictionary Search | Login Register Extras |
| hidden_self 2005-02-12 ch 1, anon. | abuseI really like this one. It's really awesome. It just speaks to me I guess. |
| Morncreek 2004-04-08 ch 1, | abuseSomewhere in between! ^_~ | Alayea: *smacks Morncreek with her Acme(TM) mallet* | O_# Ouch... I was joking! See that wink up there?! As always, Frozen Midnight produces great poetry. Sheesh. | Alayea: ^^;; Oops. | Anyways - great write! I really like the action words used, the imagery and the italicization. Why the italicization? Because it is so pretty... *hypnotized vioce* pretty... @_@. *Snaps out of it* ^^; Actually, it is amazing how formatting affects how a poem and the mood it sets. For me, the italics hekp bring a tone of mystery? haziness?... Otherworldliness! Ha - knew I could find the word. ^_^ Well, I suppose I really should stop before this review becomes a novel. ^_~ | Alayea: Sayoonara. | Have an awesome, fun-filled day! Ja. |
| Damaged 2004-03-22 ch 1, | abuseWow, very powerful poem. Excellent job. Keep writing! |
| sallyann0705 2004-03-18 ch 1, | abuseI thought that your poem was really good |
| mezzie 2004-03-18 ch 1, | abusethe opening image is very pervasive, the "orb of colour,/ Surrounded by darkness". In fact, that whole verse is wonderful. the third and fourth lines of the verse echo the first two very nicely. the second verse has some minor technical difficulties in the first line: "bekons" should be spelt "beckons" and "towards it's door" should be "toward its door" just grammar stuff. the last two lines of the second verse are awesome. the last verse fits very well with the image you've chosen for this poem. The fourth verse feels a little funny though when you bring in the "shattered mirror" image because it departs from your predominant metaphor with little reason. a reference to the orb again, perhaps being eclipsed or fallen might have fit better with the other images and verses. definitely a good piece though, many of your lines really shine. only the little things hold it back. awesome! mezzie |
| Aylae 2004-03-18 ch 1, | abusei like it. I like the style and the phrasiology (sp) that you use is good. Great. I think its great. honest :) have a nice day! |