that was seriously EXCELLENT. it was far better than the original. i thought it had a perfect rythm, structure, it flowerd really well so ignore the other person. it truly was beautiful

That is possibly your best poem, the others Im not too sure about. Theyre a little simplistic and (with all due respect) empty. This one is quite descriptive and well written. The only thing I can suggest is that you make sure your poems are consistent. For example, this one's rhyming is fine its just the structure doesnt keep a steady rythm. The others Ive read have some stanza's that rhyme and some that dont and its all a little inconsistent. Your work is good, but as I have probably said a thousand times to a few people, it needs more polish.

I like this, it leaves a "mist" lol, I know that sounds weird but it does, very good. Thanx for the review!