If you would have added a chorus in this it would have made an awesome song, still pretty awesome, good work i love it!

Nice poem, it was interesting and quick to read, also quite enjoyabe, but I liked it. Was nicely written. well keep it up. Ps, thanks for the review.
*blackangel*

This is interesting, and in case I haven't proven it already, I'm a tough critic, so I give you my first honest criticism: I like it a lot, it's able to describe something well, but I have one remark.
At the part with the key, I think it would have been better if you switched that part around.

very nice! it's very interesting and i like the way you capitalized the description words! good job!
Rikku