Overall, your story gives me a pleasant impression. Not much has happened so far (you must have some exciting action soon) but nonetheless, it is still fairly interesting.

While you pull off the regency stuff on the whole (on-dit, i will not countenance' etc- nice touches) there are some anachronisms. 'huggable'? 'private eye'. I don't think these expressions existed back in the day.

A few other small things which jarred when I read them.grammar: '. She walked to stand in front of the fire, gazing into it’s depths and warming herself'Use of commas particularly: " Also, dear Chantelle, called in yesterday afternoon to tell me her good news" should be "also dear chantelle called in...""From a small child, she had always told anyone who would listen, that winter was her favourite season." would be better as "as a small child she had always told anyone who would listen that winter was her fav..."(although I myself am guilty of bad usage of commas, a few of the commas in your chapter did read a bit awkwardly to me)other punctuation: eg. enclosing "more power to her" "leg-shackled". stylistically, i don't think it's v natural.and too many !s.

- these are all small things that you can fix up easily, but which i feel obliged to point out. (no, i like your story, honestly. But it could be better.)The only thing i found of some concern was towards the end of Rachel's letter. When Rachel is talking about their old school, ('beverly hills' - nice touch, btw) 'what times they were' etc. Frankly this sounds incredibly Unatural and Strained.esp, for example 'we are so different, yet our friendship works because we want it to.' In the context of the story, I am sorry, but this is v out of place.'if we were never to see each other again' - but her friend is just on her honeymoon. She is going to come back in good time.You should alter this part of the letter, it feels too much like exposition, and not natural in the mouth (or written word, whatever) of the character. If you want to say this, just say it, but don't make Rachel say it, because it is rather jarring.

It's a pity these faults, from my point of view, marred an otherwise quite witty story. But I'm sure you'll improve it.

Short but good.

The letter sounds quite modern, for a few reasons:

The colloquialisms. A letter was formal, and people almost always used people's full names (e.g. Christine and Sir W - whatever his full name is).

Everything about the period you've written of. I don't quite know why you've set it in this period; you don't seem interested in it in this piece because you seem to glaze over all the details that would make it truly period. You also shouldn't choose phrases because you think they might sound period, rather than what your character might say. That makes it seem modern, because everything else is unforced, modern-sounding description (in the prose).

It isn't a bad thing to have modern sounding description in a period piece, it's just when you come to the letter you can tell it seems forced, and that takes away from the piece because period speech would never sound forced to a character that actually lived there.

Anyway, I hope that helps. Good luck with future writing.

aw that is the sweetest short story I've ever read! I luv it to bits! You did well in putting you characters in to that past era. What I mean is it didnt look like someone from this time trying to sound like someone from 1819. It was perfect. Congrats *hands medal, trophy* I would be honored if you would check into my own story, "Woman of Fortune" Anyways have fun writing, then! ttfn

Very cute. The references to the former spy and all the various couples makes me wish I could read their full stories. Keep it up!

Okay, I am answering your plead for a review. Even though this story is not my 'cup of tea' (how's that for fitting the review with the story style?) I thought it was well written and tender. You like this friend of yours very much and it shows. I also like the small bit with the Butler. That was a nice touch. Anyway, well written and a nice beginning to a story along the lines of Little Women should you choose to continue. Well done and thank you for sharing.