Death—the Aztecs still give death its day—full of food and festivities. We, moderns, act as if we can evade her enticing ways; but, there's her little dance book with everybody's name; and, her polite manners to always make a call, even if she's got to do it more than once; and, then there's her caresses soft siren silken—¿Who can resist her? Which is to say—neat poem! m

Wow - this was so wonderful to start with, yet you have achieved to perfect perfection! You've still captivated everything from the first piece, while adding so much more depth and feeling - Its wonderful - er!
CoolBeans18s

I do love the changes! Its still awesome like before. This one flows better, I think, though.

I see some good changes you made from the first draft, but this is posseses the same sinistry. Awesome job!

OMG! You are so talented...this is worthy of any great poet...Shakespeare, Blake, Wilde..It is simply mind-blowing and I think you should get it published or something 'cause it seems too brilliant and perfect for this site. Write more 'cause this took my breath away, I wish one day i could write something close to this. Love, Mia

wow! what an incredible piece! one thing i really loved about this: the tone of the speaker. just something about his/her addresses to the Wise/Dark/High/etc. one, and phrases like "i tire", gave the whole poem this fantastic element of ancient forgotten history and mystery (which i love to read about). the beginning two couplets were phenomenal; hooked me right away. and the final couplet, when the Dark One responds: "no lines, little one, my name is not sand/it's written on the back of Azrael's hand" CHILLS, seriously. i haven't gotten chills from a ficpress poem in AGES. lol nice to have you back. :P anyway, absolutely love this, fantastic work, chica. kudos! :)

OMG! (Got tired of saying "Wow" hehe)
This was... beyond really well, excellent might be the same but still I think it falls a little short. This was beautiful! I loved the first four stanzas, where it's only two lines before break. Then I also loved the end of the first long stanza, and a ton of lines in the second long stanza.
There was such a strong mystical sense hanging over this piece, it was breathtaking! Truly wonderful work my friend :)

I love it! Mythology is awesome. I love learning it. Good work it!

Very abstract, and I don't get quite what it's about. It's still really awesome. I love the description, and the rhythm and stuff. Very chilling, beautiful poem.

Have a bit more confidence! Wait, what am I saying? -_-;;
No really, I LOVED this! Mythology never fails to entrance me, and the way you find a way to flawlessly intertwine two legends is greatly admirable. You deserve nothing short of a gold medal for this one.

It is true the rhythm is a little rough, but I loved the mythical sense that you seem to capture so well so many times. Great work, I hope you continue writing!

This is brilliant! I *adored* all the references to mythology in here! The abstractness really helped blend all of the different myths. The format is wonderful as welL! I really enjoyed reading this poem.
CoolBeans18s

Hey! Omg this is gorgeous, and kind of sad but beautiful...you have the best imagery ever..the voncabulary and the knowledge and the depth in the mythology behind all this is stunning. A remarkable poem, wonderful. Please write more! Love, Mia