cool. I like your layout and your use of enjambment. Keep writin'!

I swear, you take the definition of 'poignant' (sp?) on this site to a whole new level. This is sad but not in a dramatic way, sort of bittersweet. The sparse images you create are apt and speak more then your actual statements. That's an achievement in itself. ^_^

It does sound like a heartbeat, reminds me of your other poems because you have (Darkening the darkness) just like (stilling the stillness) heh I think that's quite neat... neat, you deserve a better review than this =P But you're most definitely a creative writer and a favorite of mine right now.
Jenna xx

this poem definetly sounds like a heartbeat, rhythmic but erratic
it jolts me when I read and then reread it, absorbing a little more of the meaning each time.
It begins narrative, sort of calm, and then when it reaches the line "and despair-it eclipses" I get that first jolt, as the excitement builds.
Your descriptives are awfully lovely and unique (sounds cheesy, I know).
"the eroding chrysanthemums and bluebells
that I keep by your bedside"
sounds more tender and pained each time I read it.
The last three lines round it out perfectly.
Certainly not a happy poem, but *sigh*, it is absolutely magnificent.
ps:
I agree fully. It irks me too when people give one liner reviews. It seems...cold.
Also, by the way. How DO you format these darn poems? Evil microsoft word...

I have thirty seconds, but:
eek! *clings* love!
*gone, back later to expand*

I'm in the reviewing state of mind, so don't be surprised if you see a lot of reviews popping up from me this weekend while I try to escape English class. :)
This is a Van Gogh painting personified. Especially when he was in his Japonist era, the ones he did of fields before he died. I adore the format you've been using in your poetry recently, it gives this staircasey-climbing-to-the-end feel to the poem. Lovely imagery, fantastic vocabulary.
For some reason, the lines "the eroding chrysanthemums and bluebells
that I keep by your bedside" make me feel hollow. *goes off to ponder.*
-P.M.