Woah...depressing much. I really like how you changed the positive theme of this to negative, I wouldn't have thought of it personally. Very dark, and somewhat similiar to L J Smith's 'Vampire Diaries'. You even used the same name, and the theme of having two brother's fighting over a girl. Have you ever read them? They aren't wonderful works of literary art, but they are light reading to pass an hour or so. Overall, it was very good. The only thing I noticed is that you switched between 'Stephan' and 'Stefan'.

OMG! OMG! OMG! Wow...that is fantastic. I'll have to talk to you on MSN to tell you the whole the thing, but this is absolutely brilliant. Congrats! You'll get a fantastic grade no doubt. Ah, one thing, I really really REALLY liked how he didn't repent in the end and turn all soft towards Stefan because most people don't change their minds in the end and Edric seems like the kind of man who would never change his mind no matter anything.
BRILLIANT WORK!