FictionPress.com - let the words flow
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| Pont 2005-06-14 ch 2,  | abuse'Tony cut him off. “I said shut the ** up Lou! I don’t want to hear it!”' Gramatically, when you have multiple people talking, you make a new paragraph whenever someone different says something. Just a suggestion ^_^;Keep up the good writing! This is interesting.~Ponteh |
| Pont 2005-06-14 ch 1, | abuseWhoa... creepy @_@A little confusing in the beginning, (what with mentioning Xerna but not explaining what it is until later) but it all falls into place by the end of the chappie. Interesting idea. Gosh, I'd hate to have my memories just sucked out like that *shivers*~Ponteh out. |
| the world woke up without m... 2004-05-28 ch 1, | abuseI really like it. The formatting is **, but that's easily rectified. A good story. P.S: you have great taste in music but BAD taste in games... and I like APC way more than Tool. APC are a lot more melodic, a lot simpler. Tool would never cover a song by Failure. Hmm... keep up the writing, dude. |