Wow, Tens. That was REALLY good. Not at all what I was expecting this chapter to be, even after you told me it REALLY wasn't what I thought it was going to be, lol, but it's even better. It really was very good. I can't believe MIKE apologized. Mike. Of all people. Lol. That was very strange to read, but it worked, so I don't mean strange in an off-character kinda way. It was just like, *hypothetically looks side to side... and thinks... is he REALLY apologizing? WOW.*

Yeah, I really needed this chapter badly. I'm sorry I didn't read it yesterday during my break as I had promised, or even after work. I'm trying to remember what happened... Ah, yes. It was just so busy I didn't even have the time and then ... I don't remember what I did last night. God, my memory is going away. This is killing me. But I really did need this today, so for that I'm glad I waited.

I can't wait to see more!

Keira

You know, when we were living out in the middle of PA, it being a college town and all, there were lots of bars, some that had bands come and play. So one night, we went and saw Blue Oyster Cult at this little bar. It was different, seeing someone so well known in a place with a limit of less than 900 people. This has nothing to do with my review of this chapter, by the way. Moving on...

The first part was great, with Cali waking up next to West. She's still feeling vulnerable, that's a good realistic thing to see. And then, her encounter with Mike was just...I found it very emotional. Everything about that scene, starting from her going into the bathroom and stepping in water, had me feeling right along with her.

And finally, Cali's talk-of-few-words with Rock that helped ease his mind somewhat. Now I'm really interested to see what happens, what goes wrong, knowing what we do from "Finn".

Great job, Tens, as always. Hey, here's a motto for Rock: Don't fear the reaper, just kick his a$$!

Liz :)

How is it that I never reviewed this chapter? I read it. I even remember when you posted it. But when I checked back to see what I'd said about it...nothing. Must have something to do with those beta tapes ;)

I loved this chapter. It was dark and real, and the details were spot on - Tell fixing Merit's hand, Joe memorizing all of the labels in the cupboard (something I can easily see happening, but just that you added it to the story gave it that extra something that makes the characters all the more real) - and Mike's POV, with the fern lightening things up just a little. Mike is great. I probably wouldn't think so in real life, but getting into his head and seeing what makes him tick is awesome.

So, now I'm on to the next chapter to leave another phantom review :D

Liz

it was beautiful...seriously it was really good the ending...unlike a totally cliche story where they get rid of the Cobra gang or something...

its a crime if you dont go on...seriously you've got me addicted to the story i realy need to know what happens with everyone and especially the Cobras and also Cali...update update update...if you dont i think ill die...ok then enough of the drama...

This is coming along really well. But you know what? I miss that Shakespeare guy, the one who knifed the guy's hand to the table and read to him. What can I say I have a soft spot for guys who have a fasination with books and sharp objects :P

Mike in a bad mood makes me laugh for some reason, heh. Anyways, nice work! Keep it up!

Wow. I remember the first part, and it's still as good as it was when i first read it :D I understand (and liked how it went, for that matter) that you have to do all this setting up the rest of the story thing, but i really really really really want to read what's going to happen in later parts! Lol. I hope you get the inspiration to updated this one soon.

Great job!

Yay! I get a dedication! Why Tens you shouldn't have! Ok, I'm glad you did! But besides my joy over the dedication I completely adore the last two chapters! Even though I hoped and prayed Mike was going to be her knight in shining armor Merit is still a cutie.. well in my mind he's a cutie! Great UD! I loved it!

- Gena

Holy freakin' crap! Ah! You NEED to write the next chapter and fast! My God... Poor Cali/Layne/Finn. Man. I am so into this story. It's so real and raw and bloody. Okay, so the last one isn't a reason I love it, but it makes it so intriguing that I have to love it anyway. Screw the contraditory in that. I love Rock. He's my favorite of your characters. He's so... Rock. And West of course is totally awesome. He's so funny it cracks me up. Macaroni and pasta... haha. Some people are so dumb you gotta wonder. But it's a good dumb. He's so endearing. You're right he and Trev would be great friends. I can totally see it. Thost damn guys though. Poor Cali/Layne/Finn for having to nearly experience that. And the fact that she was showing signs of weakness -- perfect. So uncliche it's just great.

Great job Tens! I love it.

Keira

Now, this was just...holy cow, this could have been right out of a movie. You are brilliant.

What stands out to me the most:1. the unusualness of the situation makes it so much more tense; even Cali is realizing that Rock never expected anything like this to happen2. she is afraid. perfect. of course she would be afraid, any normal person would be. bravo!3. she comes up with a plan that makes sense, and has to keep thinking as she goes because it's not turning out right4. her plan fails; perfect. perfect, because it happens in a realistic way5. I love that one person can make her not afraid anymore6. she is affected by what Merit does in the way you might expect a normal person to react, and the guys who attacked her turned out to be real living breathing people.7. great job switching to Rock's POV, taking us a bit into the future, then going back with Merit's POV to explain what happened. Very, very well done.

Sorry for the list, but I have to say, this chapter was just terrific - the tension, the content, the descriptions... Excellent job. Can I say that enough? You rock!

I am SO looking forward to more.

Liz

Okay, so I've read both chapters, but I figured I'd do something abnormal (for me) and review them both.

West is just so funny. Can't make pasta. Cali cracks me up, with her instructions. I laughed at the, "...he would leave it on until he touched it or something burned." I'm laughing again just typing it in. I can totally picture it, him turning around and sticking his hand on the burner he just used five minutes ago, or tossing a potholder onto it. But at the same time, you know he's smarter than he lets on. He's such a great character. Him and Trev would probably grumble at each other until they finally got into a fist-fight over something stupid, then they'd be buddies for life. We should do some time-warping and get them together one of these days...

The Cali/Rock interaction was awesome. You can really see that bond she's got with him, and how he fills in that parental gap as the person she's allowed to need and who she trusts to keep bad things from happening to her. Even when she's mad at him, and he's mad at her, he's still the person she wants with her when she sick, whether she wants it that way or not (if that makes sense).

Wonderful job, you are such a great author. On to the next chapter...

Liz

Oh yes! Go you!

That was great, and I think you pulled off Layne's reaction perfectly, a hundred times better then those teeny boppers could and we know they would have wrote what would have happened to her. Make sense? Probably not, lol.

I loved the interaction between West and Cali in the previous chapter. Real funny. West cracks me up, I love him. Great character.

Good Job pickle!

So, they all pretty much have names of States? I like it. (I live in California.)

"Wuss," I muttered

"Sissy," he replied

"Mama's boy," I countered

"Girl," he said

"Two faced, mindless, lowdown, yellow-bellied sidewinder."

"Fair enough." Mike had no come back

So funny. I read it aloud to my brother and he thinks it's funny... stupid, because he didnt read the rest, but funny.

absolutely genious writing! i love this story and am so glad you updated! nice to finally know where the nickname finn came from. pleasee UD soon!

gena

I love seeing updates for this story! So, that's where the name "Finn" originated. Rock is awesome, at least as good as a parent because he can actually be kind of scary and she doesn't see him as a dork (a status I expect to attain in about four or five years, at least from Jack).

He really knows how to get to her, too, right where it hurts! Great chapter, I enjoyed the whole thing and liked how it covered just some of the everyday goings-on. You're amazing, three updates/stories in a week. Send some of that writing bug down here, and I'll get TYL finished in a couple of days!

Liz