As Joel’s father prepared to enter him, he whispered into Peter’s ear, “Now, be a good little whore and don’t make a sound”.
Omigod. That rendered me so mindless I just sat there saying "omg teh hot."

not that bad. im actually glad that joel sint buying all that peter said. and its a bit disconcerting that peter seems to be fine after being raped(i know, i know... he had to be strong for joel but still). but to make your story even more interesting, you could add more depth to the characters and the events so that it seems more real and that we really feel what they're feeling...

Yay! I like it when you write long chapters! Please wrie them as long as possible in the future. Beep!

Well-done. Updateness?
*Grrs.* Joel's father is worse than Syne's. At least Lotus never /raped/ his son. Poor, poor Joel.
(However, if you read "All or Nothing," you'll find that Kittie/Devarian's dad is about as bad as Joel's.)
By the way, if you don't have AIM, you're welcome to email me. I just thought of that.

Aw! Poor Peter! You're so cruel! An amazing writer, but still very cruel. Poor sweeties! Ok. I'm going to get back to MY story now (yes, I'm updating! shock horror, I know!) But this chapter was very well-written. Yay!

That was a wonderful chapter. I hate how judgmental people are. you know what you should do if someone ever called you a fag or homo, you should call them hetero or something. why not? if they can discriminate you for your sexual prefference then why can't you do the same. I can't wait to read more.
Mel

oh poor peter. poor joel. danmit this stroy is so fucking sad! AH! ::Goes insane:: nice chapter..

If his nose is broken, wouldn't it be a bit hard to kiss, considering the fact that when people kiss, their noses tend to brush or bump.
All of the "Sweetie"s and "honey"s make it very unrealistic, as hardly any people speak like that all of the time. It's way too fluffy.
Your descriptions of their pain needs to be more vivid. Like "A searing pain ripped through his lower body as Joel's father entered him." And describing the pain of walking would be better, as I would think that having the skin of the anus torn would hurt a LOT. A lot lot lot lot.

Aw! poor baby! I HATE that father! ahem. Good chapter-I sort of knew what Peter was feeling... next chapter soon? Please? the fact that I have not updated is irrelevant. Pretty please? this is getting good!-in a scary kind of way.

o One for one.
I loved it. xD Cute, sad, angsty-ish, and just the kind of story I like. I tend to like the main character being tortured. -cough- yeah. PLEASE CONTINUE.
And curse his father. But father important. xDD

This is very good. You have done a great job with the darkness and everything, you've already drawn me in. I can't wait to read more.
Mel

fuck... wow. he... wow. evil father! what is the guys problem! ::glares at own father:: sorry there love my dad but evil father... ::chases dad with a stick:: whoa...

Mhm. See what you mean. Was good though! Waiting for the next chapter...

no! that dirty asshole. -.-
anyway, its a really great story.. in a way, i did understand what peter was feeling- so good job! :) update soon.

Hey, there! - You reviewed one of mine, and I'm returning the favor. - There's one more I wanna check out too; so I may be leaving feedback for another. But, this is increadable! *-* Very good for someone who's only written fluff stories. - And, yeah. Sorry if 'Night' confused you a bit. Some of it is hard to explain without some of the readers being confused; but in all, it'll get better. I promise. - Thanks again, and now I'm off to read more. Update!