 Loganberry 2004-06-24 . chapter 1Bravo! *applauds* Wonderfully evocative, and starkly beautiful. I particularly liked the opening two lines, which really set the tone perfectly.
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If I *had* to nit-pick, I'd say that maybe "Terrible within their splendor" doesn't flow perfectly, as you have to stress the final syllable of "terrible," which sounds odd... but really that's being extremely harsh.
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It's a gorgeous poem. Thank you. =:) |