You're very good at establishing mood. You can feel the character's irritation in both the weather and her actions.

She slipped on a quarter? Poor thing could probably turn bad luck into an Olympic sport. But there's probably some symbolism there that I'm currently missing :P.

Ahh, the friendliness of elders. Is there anything it can't do?

Weird turn of events at the end, but not unwelcome. Nice job, overall. Very honest, wise,and thought provoking.

Ohh! Very, very good. I'm impressed. I've always toyed around with the idea of fate, but I've never turned out anything good. Your ideas are well presented and well written. Great job.

Please R&R some of my work. I'll return the favor.